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#416839 - 11/21/12 04:11 PM Request from input
IBB Offline


Registered: 07/24/12
Posts: 12
Contacted the people in my state responsible for funding for various crisis centers after calling one and getting put off and offered no help at all.

Talked to this lady on the phone for quite some time and she pointed me to their site and services section, which only further pissed me the hell off. Told her so and she wanted feedback. First thing I told her was that it was all BS, there wasn't a single thing listed for men to get help. It was all about men helping women. Not a mention of services FOR men.

So she wanted input on language and such and anything to make it better. I told her I'd post it here and get people's input.

So this is actually a serious (she at least came across that way) request for input that hopefully might make a difference.

Check the site out at: http://www.pcar.org/engaging-men-allies

Not that I'm hopeful. I have yet to find women working in this area of things who I have gotten a sense actually give a shit or even really believe men/boys can be abused/raped. Oh sure I've found a few who "tow the line" so to speak to keep their funding, but body language always tell me they're more pissed off at the thought of having to use some of their funds to help men.

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#416891 - 11/22/12 01:22 AM Re: Request from input [Re: IBB]
crazy gecko Offline


Registered: 10/04/12
Posts: 309
Well, not recommending a website campaigning for men to stand up against violence against women, to a male VICTIM, would be a good start. The logic of that is simply mind-boggling.

I can see what they are trying to do, but the whole website a focussed around the belief that women are the victims and men are the perpetrators. I will try to read more and come up with suggestions, but it is hard to "reword" a website that is so inherently biased... mad
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#416902 - 11/22/12 02:26 AM Re: Request from input [Re: IBB]
Publius Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/13/12
Posts: 425
Loc: OH
The spirit and services behind such organizations as women centers and rape prevention groups is essential, wonderful, AND SHOULD APPLY TO ALL. Unfortunately for us, we are much like those courageous women in the 1960s and 1970s who first brought to light the reality of sexual abuse against women. Amazingly and quite to my disappointment American society (I can't speak for others) is still getting over the shock of male sex abuse. In the 1990s the Catholic Church scandal broke and it was fashionable and much much easier to say this was merely a Catholic thing. Well...

Since then the scapegoat stigma has been moving like a locust from group to group (camp counselors, boy scouts, and so on and so forth). It's as if people don't want to accept male sex abuse as a society wide problem. I understand it is much easier to cherry pick certain groups or even individuals like Sandusky but the message they end up spreading is "this doesn't happen often but guess where we found it happening! LOL newscyclegasm" I genuinely appreciate awareness being spread but the focus of the Sandusky affair seemed to be more focused on its impact on the school, Paterno's record, and Penn State as a whole. There was very little "here are the signs, let's look out, and always TELL" from what I remember.

I don't mind women's groups or any of that (in fact I like them) as long as the general public recognizes the other 8.33% of the United States population that are victims of CSA. Because of the unwarranted stigmatization attached to male victimization there is even more need to have systems in place to protect and promote the interests of male survivors including the adults.

I should never have had the experience of having spoken with a female survivor and had her react verbally/emotionally in a way that basically sounded like "I mean, it makes sense that it happened to me, but it should never happen to you!" It should never have happened to either of us. And if a female survivor is shocked at the possibility of men being victimized as well it worries me.


Edited by Publius (11/22/12 02:29 AM)
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