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#416625 - 11/19/12 08:26 AM MS in today's NY Times
Chris Anderson Offline
Executive Director
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/21/12
Posts: 217
Loc: New York
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/sports...-in-sports.html

“Sports is a place where parents send their boys to learn skills, to learn how to be teammates and how to work together — to make boys stronger and healthier,” said Dr. Howard Fradkin, author of “Joining Forces,” a book about how men can heal from sexual abuse. “It’s the place where we send our boys to grow up. The betrayal that occurs when abuse occurs in sports is damaging because it destroys the whole intent of what they started out to do.”

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#416628 - 11/19/12 09:07 AM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: Chris Anderson]
cant_remember Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/05
Posts: 997
Congrats on the coverage.

And thank you, Chris and the entire MS leadership team, for raising awareness and and providing us a home to come together to grow, share and survive.

What would we do without MS? 10,618 of us and counting.

Cant
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Recovery is possible. Hang in there, brothers.

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#416652 - 11/19/12 08:16 PM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: Chris Anderson]
SamV Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5935
Loc: Talladega, Alabama, USA
Nice work Chris and Howard. Thank you!
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#416658 - 11/19/12 09:26 PM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: SamV]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6719
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: Chris Anderson
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/sports...-in-sports.html

“Sports is a place where parents send their boys to learn skills, to learn how to be teammates and how to work together — to make boys stronger and healthier,” said Dr. Howard Fradkin, author of “Joining Forces,” a book about how men can heal from sexual abuse. “It’s the place where we send our boys to grow up. The betrayal that occurs when abuse occurs in sports is damaging because it destroys the whole intent of what they started out to do.”


I think I agree with the idea here. I went out for football team in 8th grade. It was exhilerating. I felt as though I was finally going to climb on top of the negativity of my life. I had been sexually abused and tortured at camp the year before. Nobody knew this. They only observed some of the effects in my behavior. I couldn't talk above a whisper because I was emotionally disabled. However, the football coach, who was also my gym teacher, took it upon himself to persecute me. He rudely and publicly dismissed me from the JV football team. Then in gym class, he called roll in a way that would embarrass me and emphasize my disability and make me feel bad. In the wrestling part of the gym class, he pitted me against a boy whom he thought was stronger and more confident than I was. I rehearsed the wrestling moves we had been taught and took control of the situation. I won the first round and the "coach" stopped the match.

Puffer



Edited by pufferfish (11/20/12 11:18 AM)

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#416678 - 11/20/12 04:59 AM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: Chris Anderson]
Gary31 Offline


Registered: 10/16/12
Posts: 12
Loc: Upstate NY
Congrats on the press Chris!
I was there for the panel discussion and thought it was incredible!
_________________________
Gary

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#416701 - 11/20/12 11:19 AM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: Gary31]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6719
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: Chris Anderson
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/sports...-in-sports.html

“Sports is a place where parents send their boys to learn skills, to learn how to be teammates and how to work together — to make boys stronger and healthier,” said Dr. Howard Fradkin, author of “Joining Forces,” a book about how men can heal from sexual abuse. “It’s the place where we send our boys to grow up. The betrayal that occurs when abuse occurs in sports is damaging because it destroys the whole intent of what they started out to do.”


bump

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#419415 - 12/17/12 11:39 PM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: Chris Anderson]
BuffaloCO Offline


Registered: 07/14/12
Posts: 412
Loc: USA
Congrats and thanks for the site. Because I found this place, and also got back to T, I know I will find freedom too. smile
_________________________
“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark. The real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.” - Plato

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#419418 - 12/18/12 12:41 AM Re: MS in today's NY Times [Re: pufferfish]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6317
Loc: 2 NATO Nations
Originally Posted By: pufferfish
Originally Posted By: Chris Anderson
http://www.nytimes.com/2012/11/19/sports...-in-sports.html

“Sports is a place where parents send their boys to learn skills, to learn how to be teammates and how to work together — to make boys stronger and healthier,” said Dr. Howard Fradkin, author of “Joining Forces,” a book about how men can heal from sexual abuse. “It’s the place where we send our boys to grow up. The betrayal that occurs when abuse occurs in sports is damaging because it destroys the whole intent of what they started out to do.”


I think I agree with the idea here. I went out for football team in 8th grade. It was exhilerating. I felt as though I was finally going to climb on top of the negativity of my life. I had been sexually abused and tortured at camp the year before. Nobody knew this. They only observed some of the effects in my behavior. I couldn't talk above a whisper because I was emotionally disabled. However, the football coach, who was also my gym teacher, took it upon himself to persecute me. He rudely and publicly dismissed me from the JV football team. Then in gym class, he called roll in a way that would embarrass me and emphasize my disability and make me feel bad. In the wrestling part of the gym class, he pitted me against a boy whom he thought was stronger and more confident than I was. I rehearsed the wrestling moves we had been taught and took control of the situation. I won the first round and the "coach" stopped the match.

Puffer



There is SO SO much more to sexual abuse surrounding sports and the people therein. In your case, the coach was sadistic. In my case, the town's coaches and people enabled and entitled the star and/or capable athletes into taking what they want and its OK to destroy the weak.
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