550: Time capsules are hard to keep buried in your backyard!! ANTISIPATION TOO GREAT!!

551: On Saturday mornings, stretching your t-shirt over your bare knees is just as warm as PJ bottoms.

552: Report-card day (for some of us) could be a really bad and traumatic day. Its amazing the stress and grief one lousy piece of paper can cause a child.

553-laying next to a women can be the scariest f*cking thing in the world

554: Putting vaseline on the toilet seat is the funniest thing in the world after the thud, but not after the crying.

555: You can't make a 'black light' by coloring a regular light bulb with a sharpie.

556: Deodorant is not a sculpture medium.

557: Watching your brother run into a parked car on his bicycle is both pitiful and hilarious.

558: Although sitting at lunch with a bunch of friends is fun, there is such a thing as to much laughing.

559: To much laughing is between milk squirting out of noses, and freshly eaten snadwiches coming back up.

560: On second thought, spweing milk and sndwhich every where becuase of a really funny joke, just makes it all the better.

561: mixing ur neopolitan ice cream so that all three flavors are mixed makes it taste that much better.

562: one of the BEST feelings in the world is squishing mud thru your toes

563: if you scare the girl in your street by telling her that that thing in the sky is a UFO, be aware that she WILL freak out and somehow convince everybody that she must sleep in your bed with you or she wont stop crying- oops- girls are REALLY devious

(sounds really messed up now- weird world)

564:Burning gasoline on the patio will eventally lead to setting the gas can on fire. Then if you are dumb enough to try to put it out. You better be quick about it.