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#414094 - 10/23/12 08:17 PM disguise
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3452
Loc: somewhere in Africa
I always loved Halloween:
not the candy big deal!
not the scary, spooky stuff,
but the luxury
of being someone else,
walking through the dark,
giddy with freedom,
as not myself.

I made a list weeks ahead
of the possible pseudonyms
I could assume,
the alter egos hidden within,
the secret identities
and multiple personalities,
so different from me,
weighing my options.

And then Id choose one
craft a costume,
a disguise that, not so much
hid who I was, as
made me who I wished to be,
displaced inadequate me
with better, stronger, famous,
more heroic someone else

- anybody else.


lee
19 10 23
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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#414148 - 10/24/12 08:55 AM Re: disguise [Re: traveler]
MarkK Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/02/07
Posts: 2503
Loc: Denver, CO
wow - has this made me think
my halloween costumes were just extensions of me. Like I was crying out for acceptance and making myself more likable with the costume. Even that horrible mask had to be better than the face they usually had to see...

To see it as an escape - a chance to be who/what you want without fear of reprication ... that would have definitely put a differnet slant on things.

Once again, thank you, Lee.
_________________________
the story
https://1in6.org/men/bristlecone/mark-krueger/

Kirkridge - October 2008
Alta - September 2012
Alta - September 2013

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#414214 - 10/24/12 11:59 PM Re: disguise [Re: traveler]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3452
Loc: somewhere in Africa
thanks, Mark.
i never went in for monsters or the creepy stuff.
guess i'd already had enough of that.
i was shooting for perfection:
the Lone Ranger
King Arthur
Robin Hood -
all ideal heros
strong, good, wise, capable
about as far from how i felt as i could get.


Edited by traveler (10/24/12 11:59 PM)
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


Top
#414224 - 10/25/12 03:46 AM Re: disguise [Re: traveler]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1563
Loc: New England
Traveler,

Your poem brought back a memory of a halloween from the first grade. I made a robot costume out of cardboard boxes, spraypainted silver. I thought it was the most amazing costume ever. I went out to trick-or-treat, and within minutes a bigger kid made fun of me saying I looked like a refrigerator. I ran home crying. Seems funny now, but at the time it seemed like the worst experience of my life up to that point. A refirigerator! Oh brother!

Jude
_________________________
Everyday is a winding road
I get a little bit closer
Everyday is a faded sign
I get a little bit closer to feeling fine.
Sheryl Crow

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#414487 - 10/27/12 09:29 PM Re: disguise [Re: traveler]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3452
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Jude -

ridicule of any kind can be devastating - especially when it involves a creative or expressive element of yourself.

i bet you were the cutest little robot ever!

lee
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


Top


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