i think we all ask that question - Is it worth it? - and the answer varies from day to day and hour to hour - as we are in the midst of things. sounds like you've got some better perspective now. hoping eventually to hear a more positive answer that "perhaps"!
keep writing, man!
"the scariest thing about abuse of any shape or form, is, in my opinion, not the abuse itself, but that if it continues it can begin to feel commonplace and eventually acceptable."
- Alan Cumming, "Not My Father's Son"