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#410868 - 09/20/12 07:44 PM maybe...?
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3303
Loc: back in the USA
an hour or so ago when i logged in to MS i started reading new posts like usual - and was brought to tears twice.

once was by what i see as the best of what we can do FOR one another. it was a note of kindness, support and encouragement that was healing and helpful - and - YES - loving!

the other was by a thread that i see as what we can do TO one another if we are not careful. i don't think anyone really wanted to intentionally hurt or disrespect or alienate anyone else - but things got heated and people got upset and it all went way out of control.

as i was reading - and crying - i was hurting for each one who posted - regardless of which "side" they were on. and i pictured us ALL as scared, hurt, angry, little kids who had been abused. THEY are the ones who were lashing out - and THEY are the ones reacting. the 3-yr-old or 5-yr-old or 12-yr-old or 15-yr-old (sorry if i missed your age!) who was victimized and could do nothing to stop it or resist or repair the devastating effects.

i want to always remember this image when i see someone behaving in a way that i find personally triggering. it is not the fellow-survivor that i am retaliating against - it is a perp in my past. the guy on the MS forums who caused the trigger is another hurting little kid - just like me.

Love Grace & Peace to you ...
Lee
_________________________
We are often troubled, but not crushed;
sometimes in doubt, but never in despair;
there are many enemies, but we are never without a friend;
and though badly hurt at times, we are not destroyed.
- Paul, II Cor 4:8-9

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#410876 - 09/20/12 09:54 PM Re: maybe...? [Re: traveler]
Casmir213 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/09
Posts: 845
Loc: Northeast, USA
Lee,

Good point you make and thank you for it. I agree, our reactions to each other here are influenced by why we're here. It's good to realize this and it's definitely helpful to remember where we are coming from and what we are ALL dealing with when things do get heated. Keeping an image of that shared "hurt child" inside us all and reminding each other of this child's presence at such times builds a stronger MS community.

Caz
_________________________
I see recovery as a lifelong journey rather than a final destination, a journey, though, which can have many successes along the way.

WoR Alumnus - Hope Springs, OH, October 2009

My avatar is the farmhouse at the Hope Spring, OH WoR. It's a nice place.

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#410892 - 09/20/12 10:50 PM Re: maybe...? [Re: traveler]
Jude Offline


Registered: 08/09/12
Posts: 1469
Loc: New England
Thank you Lee.

Gary
_________________________
"But now old friends are acting strange,
they shake their heads, they say I've changed.
Something's lost but something's gained in living every day
....it's life's illusions I recall, I really don't know life at all. "
Joni Mitchell

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