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#41035 - 06/16/03 04:28 PM just thought i would share
lauraanimal Offline
Member

Registered: 06/12/03
Posts: 58
Loc: montana
i got an e-mail today from my step mom, it had some grreat quotes in it and i thought i would share.

Good FRIENDS are hard to find,
harder to leave,
and IMPOSSIBLE to forget.


You can ONLY go as far as you push.
(i think this one is a great reminder about healing)


DON'T let the past hold you back, your're missing the good stuff.


LIFE'S SHORT; If you look around once in a while, you might miss it.


A BEST FRIEND is like a four leaf clover. HARD TO FIND and LUCKY TO HAVE.


Some people make the world SPECIAL just by being in it.
(this makes me think of everyone here)

BEST FRIENDS are siblings, God forgot to give us.


GOOD friends are like STARS,
you don't always see them, but you know they are ALWAYS THERE.
(this also reminds me of this place)

EVERYTHING is okay in the end. If its not okay, then its NOT the end.


Most PEOPLE walk in and out of your life,
but only FRIENDS leave footprints in your HEART.

REMEMBER: every minute spent angry is 60 SECONDS of happiness wasted.


this is my favorit

When it HURTS to look back,
and you're SCARED to look ahead,
you can look beside you and your BEST FRIEND will be there.


however i want to change it just a tad

When it HURTS to look back,
and you're SCARED to look ahead,
you can look beside you and everyone here will be there.

as i said just thought i would share.


Laura

_________________________
always be true to your self and your heart.
dont forget to love yourself 1st, then the restwill fall into place.

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#41036 - 06/18/03 02:09 PM Re: just thought i would share
hdan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/06/03
Posts: 43
Loc: Texas
Thanks for sharing your feelings about good friends. It helps so much to have a good friend to help you through things.

However, in my case, I never allowed myself to have a good friend so I have a little trouble relating to what you have written, however true that it might be. I was sexually abused by males so, as a natural side effect, I had a wall up between myself and other guys. I would ask myself, "Why do they like me? I bet they don't like me but really just want something from me. Or if they do truly like me, they won't for long after they really get to know me."

Part of the torture of male abuse is the secrecy involved, the reluctancy to share it with others who won't understand, the reluctancy to get hurt once again, and...the lack of good friends. My wife had several of what I call "lifetime friends", although she too has sexual abuse in her past. But as a male, I would never trust anyone enough. I know that I have to eventually get over this, but part of me still says "don't trust them. If they really know what I've gone through they'll dump me as a weiro or a fag (no insult intended but included because of its expressiveness of the homophobia that we sometimes have).

So I hope over time to know - to feel - what you feel about friends.


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#41037 - 06/18/03 02:28 PM Re: just thought i would share
godsrabbit Offline
Member

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 98
hdan,

i know how you feel...i love people dearly...from a distance...i would rather love than be loved...i trust no one but God (and even then sometimes i get cranky)....friendship is elusive to me because i have always felt i could not maintain a balanced one with anybody...i was always either subverting my needs to please them, or they were fawning on me (which i detest)...and, like you said, always made me question what they wanted...

the only friends i have managed to keep in my life are the ones who forgive me every time i push them away, which i do a lot...given enough space and a great deal of patience, i can actually say i have grown attached to a few men on a healthy level (women friends are still easier)...

this is something i am working on very much right now...and a large part of the reason i am at this site...


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