I had an aunt who before she passed said, dying young is easy, getting old and leaving a corps full of life experience , well that is not for wimps.
So you being str8 would be a hell of a lot less tiring, no question, but as many have said the best part is just being who you are finally that the secrets dont rule you anymore. I played tennis today with a str8 buddy, just no problem at all. We joked and he said said now he knows what an ass whooping feels like. " not in my world I said" he just laughed cuz of course its a joke.
I just came out 2 years ago come the first week of october, i was so frozen for so long. the thaw is a process but the steak is finally ready, lol. Be as honest as you can, if he is really into you , his eyes will tell you. If he is not making eye contact it is more likely just a friendship, the only way to know is to be up front. Then there is the fear what if he is not gay. Then use arnolds line when he was still a body builder "take it as a complement" ! smile and walk away. nothing more need be said.
Ya its tiring but anything worth working for is the reward. Its like the spoiled rich kids, they havent got a clue of the value of things and dude, you clearly do.
The need for love lies at the very foundation of human existence. Dalai Lama
WoR Barrie 2011