To RachelMac,
I think we are in very similar places, especially based on your other posts. No, my husband has not gone to a support group. He goes to a therapist who specializes in EMDR once a week, but he doesn't talk about it.

We go to couples counseling on an as needed basis which right now seems to be about once every two or three weeks.

I have found individual counseling to be very, very helpful because of my own history but also because in this relationship and with me being so sensitive, it's difficult for me to stay focused on my own self worth, to create loving boundaries, to believe that i'm strong enough to be in this relationship. it's not an abusive relationship, it's just a difficult one,

I've told him that I found this site and that it's been good for me and he listened, but did not respond. He sees me typing on here. I don't hide it, just like the books on CSA and relationships. But he's not ready.

I hope to read more from you. It's so good to know there are others.

P.S. I don't think it would work for everyone, but honestly, I got myself a dog. The most perfect, doting, snuggly dog on earth and it sounds kind of sad, but calvin (the dog) gives me a lot of support.