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#408142 - 08/27/12 08:26 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
Awareness is winning half the battle tho Lee.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

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#408146 - 08/27/12 08:41 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
Lee,
You are a great poster and give great advice bud. I wish I could help you more or be as well illustrated in my points as you are. I hate to hear you struggling.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#408307 - 08/29/12 12:24 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
I was finding myself falling into the over achiever mode. I was feeling like I HAD to reply to every single post. This is a common mistake of most abused is te wanting to overdo things to be accepted or looked up to. I am in no way a great person or role model. I am a new person tho because God made me new. I am made in His own image. I was made worthy of great things because Jesus died for me. My name will be on the role when it is called or that great trumpet sounds. I had a conversation with a guy today who was abused also. I had no clue that when God caused our paths to cross that this would be all for a reason. I told him about this site an he is trying to mend his marriage. I gotta share this story,,
My wife and I had gotten back together a moved into a new house. We were going to rent our house out. We had several people come by and look on Saturday on a open house and then I prayed, I prayed that God would show me who to rent to. Then this guy came by. He said he was just riding by and seen te signs for the open house and him ad his wife are looking to move. Now we are sharing our CSA with each other. Unfortunately for him they are separated now. But this shows that God has a plan for everything.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#409072 - 09/05/12 02:09 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
I guess that recovery is like anything else in life. There are relative and proactive people/ ways of recovery. I know that after all my knee surgeries the doctors said I recovered quickly and was ahead in my therapy. I did alot of stuff at home to get better and heal quicker. Had I sat at home and just waited for my doc and my therapists to do all the exercises with me and for me then I would not have Ben healing or recovering as well. I see in my CSA recovery that it is harder than just sitting at home and doing leg extensions. It takes me reading and being honest with myself about reasonable goals. I feel like I am healing well. My rage is pretty much under control. I still get depressed at times tho. I know that God has helped me more than anything in this process and also having a caring wife that understands because she has done some reading as well. I don't tend to dwell on the fact that I was abused as much as I do te fact that it is over and I can not change it so let's get better from here. I got see my new T for our second appt tomorrow.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#409250 - 09/06/12 05:36 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
Went to my new T for our second appt today. Appt was at 1030 and she had me down at 10. Wow. The wife and I both recalled us agreeing to 1030. I also had a bogus $80 charge from the new T on my card, which she adjusted and I truly believe was an honest mistake.
So she starts talking to me about EMDR and she is certified in this. It sounds very interesting. I think it may help. The appt was very short because she has another client at 11 and all we spoke about was the EMDR. But I am way happier with this T than my other one. I think my time here at MS is coming to a close. I have moved beyond the level of help that I think can be provided here. It was very helpful at first to see what worked for others and what didn't. To see others feelings and comments. It seems like some get better by self loathing. I understand, we have all been thru trauma and some get thru it in their own ways. I chose to quit watching porn and quit self medicating with alcohol. I choose to move to a point forward and not continue looking back on what could have been or should have been. I can not control my past. God has played a biggest part in healing these afflictions. There is a very diverse group here and I see that that is a good thing. Diversity and different opinions have always been needed in moving forward and improving, if all you hear is people agreeing with you and like opinions then you cant see the other side to issues.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#409283 - 09/06/12 09:16 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6571
Loc: Never Sugar Mountain
[Comment removed. Please refer to the guidelines regarding personal attacks.]


Edited by ModTeam (09/15/12 11:56 PM)
_________________________
You are using 118 of the 300 allowed characters.

Still Not Recognized


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#409286 - 09/06/12 09:21 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
[Comment removed to conform to site guidelines.]


Edited by ModTeam (09/15/12 11:55 PM)
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#409955 - 09/12/12 05:10 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
I think now more than ever before there is a need for survivors to be heard. It seems with so many perps in high leek places being caught that the public is more open to this really being a issue. There are pro ball players coming out and sports announcers coming with their CSA. I think it is a great time for us as survivors to be accepted and seek help an maybe it will make others feel comfy coming out with their CSA.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#410529 - 09/18/12 01:03 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
Just the smallest little thing said or done can bring a trigger and start depression. It is amazing that it is so easy to be torn completely down to the point where you want to just give up by just a few words. It is like taking a fire and just pouring water all over it. It is like getting punched right the the sternum or getting slapped in the head with a ball bat. I mean I would rather be kicked in the mouth than feel like I feel when I get depressed. I just don't understand it. Sometimes I think that isolation is the only way.
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

Top
#410553 - 09/18/12 07:32 PM Re: To be honest with you. My thoughts [Re: Country]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3486
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Country - come on, man - look what you just said:

***Just the smallest little thing...***

AND

*** ...just a few words."

You KNOW it is little things that trigger - and that they aren't that important in themselves. this is where we over-react. when you are outside of it - looking at it objectively, you can see that the triggering words or events are not that serious. it is our past, our memories, our feelings - that are the big stuff. and they are manageable. you don't have to go back there and re-live it. acknowlege those things and decide to deal with them in a healthy way instead of becoming the victim all over again. get yourself back into the present. breathe. tell yourself some Truths. remind yourself where you are and who you are and Who is with you - and you can DO this. Don't be overcome with evil - but overcome evil with GOOD.

Lee
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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