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#407620 - 08/23/12 04:21 AM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6317
Loc: 2 NATO Nations
I'm sitting alone in my empty house. My kids are not with me.

I had fully lost the path that was rightfully set for me in childhood by God.

I built a path, with God's help, in, around, under and over the debris from that childhood. Then i lost that as well.

Sitting here in an empty house without my kids, my wife, my family...staring down the barrel of questionable future. The internet does not have enough ink to itemize losses I'm feeling tonight. But the losses are very real, and i wish I could cry.
_________________________
Jesus Loves The Hell Outta Me!

Still's Globs

New Video

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#407622 - 08/23/12 05:50 AM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
cant_remember Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/05
Posts: 997
Robbie, we love you. It's OK to cry if you can.
_________________________
Recovery is possible. Hang in there, brothers.

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#407853 - 08/24/12 11:49 PM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6723
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: Robbie Brown
I'm sitting alone in my empty house. My kids are not with me.

I had fully lost the path that was rightfully set for me in childhood by God.

I built a path, with God's help, in, around, under and over the debris from that childhood. Then i lost that as well.

Sitting here in an empty house without my kids, my wife, my family...staring down the barrel of questionable future. The internet does not have enough ink to itemize losses I'm feeling tonight. But the losses are very real, and i wish I could cry.


Sounds like me.

My dog is here.

I just can't trust people very much. So they don't sense warmth in me an I'm not fun to be with because I'm morose.

Puffer



Edited by pufferfish (08/25/12 04:05 PM)

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#407995 - 08/26/12 01:19 PM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
SJD Offline


Registered: 08/26/12
Posts: 1
Loc: East Coast
I have lost my ability to show my trust and emotions with anyone, except when I am drunk. The child inside of me is able to break free for a little while.
Almost lost my wife this week and know that I need to take my life back.
Just joined today and this is the first board I entered. So I would say that I gained hope today.

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#407996 - 08/26/12 01:25 PM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1251
Loc: kansas
Apparently I somehow lost trust with others since I've been finding out that there have been several people, within the last few weeks, that has found it necessary to lie to me.

Perhaps I should just not talk to anyone anymore. That way there's no chance of anyone telling me more lies.
_________________________
live another day. climb a little higher.

my story

my vlog

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#407997 - 08/26/12 01:29 PM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: SJD]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1363
Loc: California
Hey SJD,

Welcome to MaleSurvivor, and sorry that you have to be here. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse (CSA) we are thrust into a life altering experience, and consequently, development. Recovery from CSA is mystifying, hard, gut wrenching, but ultimately the most rewarding thing you can ever do in your life.

I've been addressing CSA 1.6 years (about the same amount of time I've been here), and I, and many others will tell you you're in for a wild roller coaster as you pursue recovery from CSA.

We're here to support each other, hear each other, listen, discuss, and even debate. But ultimately, our goal as brothers in recovery is to SHARE. It has been the cornerstone of my own personal recovery.

Welcome home, dude. If you've been molested or were exposed to sex before you were ready to explore it on your own, you are a survivor, and thus, we share many of your darkest secrets.

You're no longer alone.

D

Originally Posted By: SJD
I have lost my ability to show my trust and emotions with anyone, except when I am drunk. The child inside of me is able to break free for a little while.
Almost lost my wife this week and know that I need to take my life back.
Just joined today and this is the first board I entered. So I would say that I gained hope today.
_________________________
It's a heroes journey, and you are the hero.

-- I must remind myself that sugar is my enemy. I can't control my sugar consumption and sugar makes me mentally unstable. I'm reminding myself (because I forgot again).

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#454212 - 11/18/13 07:10 AM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Shields]
une.vie.d.espoir Offline


Registered: 12/06/10
Posts: 106
Loc: Quebec-Canada
Hi Shields,

I would like to ask you permission to use what you have wright "Waht did I lose:".

So i can translate it in french. I am french speaking and would like to use it as to help others man that possibly have bean abuse them self.

Jean-Pierre

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#454221 - 11/18/13 08:24 AM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
SoccerStar Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/15/12
Posts: 915
Loc: New York
The memory shield ruptured when I was a grown man. I lost my entire sense of identity, masculinity, safety, confidence, self-history, and self-worth. I lost what I thought had been the payoff of a 10-year internal struggle to understand and accept my sexual feelings as just being part of me. I nearly lost my job, my marriage, and my life.
_________________________
My story

"Don't think it hasn't been a little slice of heaven just because it hasn't!" --Bugs Bunny

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#454426 - 11/19/13 09:37 AM Re: What did YOU lose? [Re: Still]
frozen Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/26/07
Posts: 22
Loc: Europe
I lost 20 years of my life. When I got my life back, I was already wearn and torn. Where did my childhood and youth go?

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