I've been burdened with flashbacks ever since October of 2007. They came like cascading water through a broken dam. They were horrible and violent.

These days, they are even worse for some strange reason. I'm not complaining. I'm just asking "why?"

Why are they more vividly emotional now? The emotional memory...the emotional replay --- its all too damn raw! I mean really freakin RAW!

I really don't feel its necessary to my existence (I did NOT say "healing").