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#405622 - 08/02/12 08:27 AM Your T: Experienced in CSA or not??
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
I'm currently looking for a T so I can restart therapy. But all of my efforts to find one experienced in male CSA has yielded nothing in my area. I'm wondering how did you find the therapist that worked? Did you just pick one from your list of Ts in your insurance network and go from there or did you look for one that has CSA expeierence?

Jason
_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#405626 - 08/02/12 09:05 AM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Shields Offline


Registered: 08/01/12
Posts: 13
Loc: Georgia
It is not always the easiest to find a T with the right experience that fits your needs. Some of it will simply be trial and error. I will say that if you meet with a T and they are not fitting your needs then you should have no obligation to go back to them. You may have to try a few different T's before you find one that fits your needs best. I recently picked an in network T, but found them by first calling one on my providers list and talked to them about my situation. That particular T did not meet my needs but they recommended a T that specialized in CSA, and that is how I found a T that better suited my needs. I have tried many T's over the years, and not all worked out well, and as frustrating as that was it led me to one that has helped me to start my healing journey.

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#405627 - 08/02/12 09:06 AM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
ACRoberts Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/10
Posts: 242
Loc: New Jersey (recently moved fro...
Jason,
Not sure where you are in NJ, but there are two very capable experts in our area. Ken Singer is in NJ and Richard Gartner is in NYC. I work with a private therapist in NYC who has helped (and continues to help) me find my way through the mess. I am in a survivor group with Richard Gartner which is an incredible source of healing. I know he currently has two groups. If you are interested in getting more information, send me a PM.

Wishing you continued healing...
_________________________
Allan
________________________
WOR Sequoia 2011--it has changed my life!

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#405650 - 08/02/12 05:50 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Publius Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/13/12
Posts: 396
Loc: OH
Let me begin by saying good for you for taking this big step forward. In fact, I believe the beginning of my search for a therapist was the first positive step I took after the world crashed down around me. It felt great and things have only improved, albeit slowly, since that pivotal decision.

That being said now is the time to figure out what you are looking for in a therapist. Do you want to see a male or female one? What kind of background do you want them to have in addition to experience with CSA? I used an APA website and after about a week found three therapists out of dozens with the level of experience I desired. Feel free to contact many therapists with questions and concerns or even place a phone call in order to see how you feel about each one.

DO NOT just throw darts at a board or pick someone based on some arbitrary guideline. Know what you want and find out how well they can provide it. Lastly, when your therapy begins I highly encourage you to be 100 percent honest. The more you put into your therapy the more you get out of it!
_________________________
"Life is like this dark tunnel. You may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place." ~ General Iroh

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#405673 - 08/02/12 11:18 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
onlyakid Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1552
Loc: New Jersey
Allen,
I'm atleast 1:15 from Ken and a good 1:30 from dr. Gartner plus the delays of getting into the city. What I'm trying to find out is Do I need to drive all that way or have people had good experiences going to some drs that aren't specialists in CSA.

Publius,
Thanks for the idea with the apa I hadn't thought about that. I'll look into that, thanks
_________________________
"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love is...you just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"


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#405678 - 08/03/12 12:13 AM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Publius Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/13/12
Posts: 396
Loc: OH
I see a therapist who does not specialize in CSA and have phenomenal results. It is important to find a therapist who treats your history of CSA as a central component of your trials and tribulations rather than an aside. Although the mental health field is improving in general in the area of CSA there are stories about therapists who look at a patient exhibiting alcoholism, drug abuse, SSA, and so on and so forth without realizing/accepting CSA as the root cause. So make sure when you are ready and find a therapist you like that he/she understands where you are coming from and where you want to go.
_________________________
"Life is like this dark tunnel. You may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place." ~ General Iroh

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#405823 - 08/04/12 11:46 AM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
chambers Offline


Registered: 04/17/12
Posts: 118
Loc: VA
My therapists doesn't specialize in CSA but in trauma, anxiety, and depression. I think a therapist that specializes in trauma is a good start if you can't find one nearby who specializes in CSA.

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#405826 - 08/04/12 12:23 PM * [Re: onlyakid]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217
*


Edited by Smalltown80sBoy (04/29/13 11:49 AM)

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#405881 - 08/05/12 02:25 AM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Anomalous Offline
Greeter Coordinator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 03/07/10
Posts: 1340
Hi OnlyAKid,

You may also want to check out Psychology Today. The site has listings of therapists for all states and counties. You can choose the type of therapist you are seeking as well as the area(s) to which you are willng to travel.





Anomalous
_________________________
Acceptance on someone else's terms is worse than rejection.

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#405911 - 08/05/12 05:04 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Jim1961 Online   content
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/10/09
Posts: 1116
Loc: Pa, but likely traveling...
I lucked out and found an experienced CSA counselor who also focuses on sexual identity issues. He counsels guys all over the world (via Skype), and happens to be here in Pittsburgh.
_________________________
Loneliness is a power that we possess to give or take away forever. -Yes, Starship Trooper

My Story

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#406011 - 08/06/12 02:37 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
ACRoberts Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/07/10
Posts: 242
Loc: New Jersey (recently moved fro...
Jason,

My private therapist is not a "specialist" in CSA. I started with him about 12 years ago and he has been perfect for me in dealing with the issues as they unfold. He has been very supportive in my reaching out to other survivors as well as joining Richard's survivor group therapy. Degrees and certifications do not make a good therpist. I believe that it is first a talent and then the training which allows them to help people heal.

Good luck in your search!
_________________________
Allan
________________________
WOR Sequoia 2011--it has changed my life!

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#406619 - 08/12/12 10:09 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Richard Gartner, PhD Offline
Past President
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/20/00
Posts: 404
Loc: New York, NY, USA
There is a chapter in my book Beyond Betrayal called Helping Yourself Heal. In it there is a section on choosing a therapist. That section is reprinted on my web site (http://richardgartner.com/BeyondBetrayal12.html) I go through a lot of the characteristics to consider when choosing a therapist, including how to ask him or her about experience with male sexual victimization,
_________________________
www.richardgartner.com

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#406626 - 08/12/12 11:39 PM Re: Your T: Experienced in CSA or not?? [Re: onlyakid]
Jim1104 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/16/11
Posts: 407
Loc: Louisiana, USA
Yes, he is experienced in CSA. I basically lucked out.
_________________________
Jim
Male/USA

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