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#405536 - 08/01/12 03:15 PM Selfwareness
HappyDays Offline


Registered: 06/16/12
Posts: 28
I posted the other day for advice on AA, I finally work up the strength to go on Sat. I sat there and listen to the people talk and realized how much I had in common with them. I can trace back all my drinking to the my emotions which are all over the place at times. Happy drink, sad drink, anger drink Hell any reason drink. I have been everyday since listening and talking very little for now. I have been to 8 meeting since Sat. Few person even talked about there own abuse, it was shocking to here in a public form it also felt good to know that other people have turned to the bottle feel no emotions. I have admitted to being an alcohlic, a whopping 5 days without a drink, I have my 24 hour chip trying to live one day at time with both abuse and with out the drinking. Frist time in over 20 years. I feel like I found another piece to the puzzle of all this shit!!
_________________________
Anything and all things are possible when you understand the feelings coming from you heart

Courage, honor, respect = strength!!!!

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#405576 - 08/01/12 10:19 PM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
kcinohio Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/06/12
Posts: 315
Loc: Ohio
Congratulations HappyDays. 5 days is great. Glad you are attending meetings and getting so much out of them. Went to one myself today, been going for years.

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#405605 - 08/02/12 03:28 AM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
WHooooopeee
Well done Happy Days
I am the first to admit that AA is not for everybody, (I have run a group For 2 years now) but when it feels good then it is good.
I am proud of you, I know how it is to stop the drink, and yep it does get easier.
Two things I can advise you on.
1) The more I talk about it the easier it gets.
2 Keep going back, it works if you work it, so work it you are worth it.

Looking forward to the 6 month tag, GO BRO.

Heal well
Martin
_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

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#405652 - 08/02/12 06:05 PM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
Publius Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/13/12
Posts: 396
Loc: OH
Well done sir!
_________________________
"Life is like this dark tunnel. You may not always see the light at the end of the tunnel, but if you keep moving, you will come to a better place." ~ General Iroh

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#405662 - 08/02/12 08:13 PM * [Re: HappyDays]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217
*


Edited by Smalltown80sBoy (04/29/13 11:46 AM)

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#405686 - 08/03/12 08:15 AM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
HappyDays Offline


Registered: 06/16/12
Posts: 28
Thank you all of the encouraging words and support, I got through day 6 and today will be the hardess for me. Today is day 7 and it happens to be my birthday. I had to look back and think when was the last birthday I had without a drink, it been 29 years. I will make it through this day some how some way, there has been many frist so far this year, I have admit how much the abuse has effect my day to day life, how I push people away, how I can not ask for help, how drinking effects my emotions and others, how many bad choice I have made during my life and the list keeps growing. I gave myself an early birthday present last Sat when I attend my frist AA meeting. I asked for help, last night in AA I said out lound to the group I need help and that is way I am here. Most of my life I have ask for help in the such bad manner, I was whinning, screaming, feel extremely weak and embrassed about needing help. Today I realize the strong thing a person can do is ask for help and I choice to do in the right manner today, it is my choice on how I do it and those that do want to help I will let them in my life, those who and have walked way that is there choice. I am also choice to help other for the great good and I do have things to offer others. I am working very hard on accepting the way things are an just letting this happen to see what life brings me. Letting this happen and letting go is so fucking hard, however if I control things how the hell will I ever now who I really am and how really cares. Today is my birthday and I going to try to relax with my kids and have some fun and just let the day happen. Tomorrow I will try to do the same let things happen, each day let it happen 24 hours at a time and try to make good choice and admit when I have made bad one in all aspect of my life. So happy birthday to me!!! and my present to me is I am greatful and can see the positive changes around me!!!
_________________________
Anything and all things are possible when you understand the feelings coming from you heart

Courage, honor, respect = strength!!!!

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#405740 - 08/03/12 05:55 PM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
Country Offline


Registered: 02/29/12
Posts: 642
Loc: Alabama
First off congrats on seeking help and getting sober. That is a huge step. It is tough but stay strong and stay focused and realize you are a survivor and not a victim any longer. You owe it to yourself to stay sober. It only destroys YOU and your closest loved ones.


Edited by Country (08/03/12 05:55 PM)
_________________________
Ephesians 6:13

Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand.

Ephesians 5:25

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her

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#405748 - 08/03/12 06:55 PM * [Re: HappyDays]
Smalltown80sBoy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/25/12
Posts: 2217
*


Edited by Smalltown80sBoy (04/29/13 11:47 AM)

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#405813 - 08/04/12 10:23 AM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
HappyDays Offline


Registered: 06/16/12
Posts: 28
Thank you my follow brother, today is day 8. I had to attend three metting yesterday, but I made it through the day. I enjoyed some times with my boys. My oldest looked at me yesterday and told me he was proud of me for taking this on. He knows about the abuse and now about the drinking problem. I have realized the best choice I have ever made was to have kids, I am thankful and greatful that some how my ex and I raised kids that are extremely loving and caring. hmmm I have made some good choice in life and today I am realizing it. Another piece of the puzzle that I have done good in some aspect of my life now it is time do some more good for me and I know that will bring joy and love to other. 24 hours at a time for me make sense on how to live life.
_________________________
Anything and all things are possible when you understand the feelings coming from you heart

Courage, honor, respect = strength!!!!

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#405861 - 08/04/12 07:32 PM Re: Selfwareness [Re: HappyDays]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3379
Loc: somewhere in Africa
congrats - proud of you!!!

words of affirmation from your son - priceless...

Lee
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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