My husband recently celebrated his birthday and says that he is looking forward to this being the best year of his life. I am all for that, but he has just begun the healing process and from everything I have heard and read it is a long process. I just do not want him getting his hopes up to just be let down.

Having someone by him will help with the healing process. His attitude and commitment seem to be there. But it can be an emotional roller coaster of ups and downs. He just needs to understand sometimes two steps forward and one step backwards. No one is perfect and when he stumbles he needs to pick himself up--taunts and verbal attacks will not help--sometimes silence and a smile go a long way.

He wants to heal and that is so important. Good luck and I wish him and you a good year.

A little optimism never hurt anyone. It's his birthday, so why should he have a dark cloud over his head? He will go through his own recovery on his terms, but having a positive attitude that it will get better, is something that will help him go further in his recovery. He probably already knows deep down that recovery isn't a soothing cup of international coffee but is trying to keep a positive attitude. The best thing you can do is to stand by him in good times and in bad, just as you promised when you first got married.