Hard to answer this, reality bites. Looking you in the face while avoiding eye contact with it.
When talking about some of these things, I can't look friends or even my therapist in the face. The shame is there and the hurt too, I would rather ignore it.
Reality is that even after all these years the kid in me wants his dad back. I only had him around 12 years and don't remember the first 3 too much, so that is really 9 years. Subract all the time he was away, and that is even less.
I haven't had children yet, there is always hope.
It will very cool to be in a delivery room someday, even though I will be worry that everything goes well. I sure as hell wouldn't want to deliver a baby, glad I am a man.
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni*** The Round Table
, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat