I have had a look at that, thanks for the recommendation.
There are still so many issues with our relationship that i haven't mentioned on here. I guess i'm wanting to vent....
His mother and sister have NEVER accepted me, never taken the time to get to know me even. Over nearly 10 years, they have both tried to find fault with anything. Examples;
I wear make up for a party (yeah, really!) I have veiny hands, I must be so insecure because i was unhappy about my husband spending so much time viewing porn, and that he should leave me, slanderous attacks at my beloved family, when they met them once at our wedding, the list goes on.
My husband's aunt accidentally nearly caused a fire on board a domestic UK flight, luckily the smouldering really took hold in the taxi on leaving the airport of disembarkation! (Acetone put in an unrinsed container of something else.) My mother in law and sister in law thought that this was so funny and perhaps they too should "take nail varnish remover on board some planes and start some fires". Why did she say this? Because I had said prior that this wasn't funny. (I used to be Cabin Crew and took my responsibility very seriously). A mad statement for sure.
This sounds all so childish to you reading this now, but it's been an enduring big deal to me. My fault was that I never defended myself. But my husband's fault, is that he never stuck up for me either, even on hearing cruel, inaccurate remarks.
My husband finds it impossible to speak up when it matters, yet instead will often sympathise with the people making the cruel remarks. He will NEVER go against his mother or sister even when it is absolutely the appropriate thing to do.
Now i am a quiet, polite, demure, decent girl, not perfect, but i have not done anything to warrant this kind of treatment by in laws and at times, so called friends. I guess that much of my husband's inability to stand up is tied in with his sexuality.
It's so hard to try and support someone who has so many issues which impact negatively on our relationship. God, i have tried. I just don't really know what to do next, other than read and educate myself...
Thanks for reading.