her father/ perp wrote her a letter saying sorry and blabla...and she wrote back the following letter:
i understand what you are saying but i dont know if i can agree with it. you have promised a lot of things that were realy important to me and its not like you kept any of those promises. i dont know yet what to believe and if there is anything i should believe, rather not. i WANT to believe you at the same time i dont want to get hurt again, so i wont believe a thing you are saying for now. my body and mind are not ready for any more damage.
everyone says that they are proud of me, but it doesnt feel that way. everyone says that i have done everything right. why didnt i then say anything earlier? why didnt i push you away earlier? why didnt i hate myself? i have have done so much better but i dont think you understand what i am saying here anyway.
while you did this thing to me in the past 4 years, all my feelings got mixed up. i wanted you to stop but i felt too weak for making you do it. i loved you as my fahter who i never actually had. i hated you for lying to me. HATE, LOVE, WEAKNESS! who can control that? i felt left behind with al lmy pressure. i felt i was running along path which doesnt ever end. i felt like shouting, crying but it was like someone cut my head off. at the same time i had to take responsibilities like school, friends, sports. but yeh! you are right!...i managed everyting pretty well. but my questions are still open. i lost my confidence a long time ago and one thing is sure! I WANT IT BACK!!! you are the only one who can help me at this point. i want you to change to be a perfect, safe and true honest man who knows what feelings are. a man who can see who the people are who really love you, who actually care. a man who appreciates that. if you have bevome that person, i can get my confidence back. you owe me big time!
there is something else i want. i want a father who loves me in a way a father should love his daughter. i want a father to talk to, a father to mess around with, to fight with. i miss the father whom i had before the abuse started. but i dont think i will ever get him back without any abusive thoughts. the only thing i cna do is to HOPE. to hope that i am important enough for you to change.
everything is always okay in the end, if it's not, then it's not the end