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#440625 - 07/11/13 04:24 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
ThisMan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/22/13
Posts: 767
Loc: upper south
Thebo,

I have been following since joining the site and I find your journey fascinating. What a great way to move forward in life.... Using your gifts of art and your desire to help others and your own experiences. Congratulations on your finals presentations and on your grades. Your hard work is paying off and I truly love the idea of the gallery presentation as an awareness tool. I must share, it has been my personal experience that sometimes the therapists themselves (all female) do not understand the destructive power of sexual assault on the male. They are at once threatened, accusatory, and minimalistic in their approach, but to professional to admit it. Perhaps this is where the fellow student was coming from when she asked the "effectiveness" question.

Again, thanks for the update Thebo, and its great to hear you are moving forward in such a productive, exciting way.
_________________________
For now we see through a glass, darkly.



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#440671 - 07/11/13 06:40 PM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
concerned_husky Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/29/12
Posts: 585
Thebo,

I second what ThisMan said. I haven't voiced this enough, but for someone who is trying to build his life around art, your story of using art to recover and to help others recover as well is truly, truly inspiring. Kudos to you for your work so far - I'm looking forward to hearing updates.
_________________________
Husky

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#440701 - 07/12/13 03:00 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
Thebo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/11
Posts: 328
Loc: NYC
Thank you for your kind words.

At one time I tried posting artwork here and it was not allowed. It is too graphic. If you want to see it go to FB and go to Dusty Epson's page. He has a group called See Our Voices. Some of my work is there.

I understand your experiences. One of the first classes I took was Understanding and Treatment of Victims of Abuse. The model, which goes back to the '70's is based on the assumption that the male is the perp and the victim is female. Treatment, legal systems, medical and social services, recovery programs etc. are based on that model and that model alone, even today. I hear what you're saying about the female therapists and the deduction about the classmate.

I am sympathetic to the helping professions. These binary gendered role models require challenge and change. Unfortunately for clients for decades the therapists they produced are among us. I thank God that, although he stumbles into some of the patterns, he is genuine and sincere and has no problem with enlightenment. Many cling to their theory and afraid to part with it even when they see it does not work. Even more people are threatened by any socialized gender stereotypes we've had so ingrained into us. After all, if men aren't strong and invincible, if men, even if they are little boys, can be vulnerable, then what the hell is the world coming to? Often it really does boil down to that antiquated notion.

We are at a crossroads. What I am studying is a modality, not unlike physical or occupational therapy. Creative arts therapies (art, music, play and acting, to name a few) engage both lobes of the brain completely. Therefore the results can be quite remarkably different than with regular talk therapy which focuses mainly on engaging one side of the brain. Through the arts therapies it is being discovered that many schizophrenics are misdiagnosed trauma victims. Studies are being conducted presently on actual schizophrenics and the effects of making art is having on them. Also, it is being discovered that neurology could play heavily in patterns of mental illnesses. Creative therapies, it is being researched, may generate neurological activity that effects brain function in a positive way.

So, the helping and medical professions, in my humble opinion, would behoove themselves to regularly take some brush-up courses. Unfortunately many in these professions become proud and self-assuming to the point that their initial vision dims.

Anyway, TM, I hear you about the shortchanging that men get in mental health and crisis services, to name only two arenas, because of poorly prepared professionals. Part of a csa/asa survivor's job is to force our hand on them and educate them as much as the public. It is unfortunate that has become our job. However, the upside in educating professionals about who we are and what our needs really are is that we can call some of the shots.

My parting shot for this entry is a story about the final paper I presented for the Victims of Abuse class. We had to pick three of the case studies from class and discuss particular points, but we could state opinion as well. Mind you, I did fulfill the requirement. However, I did bring up the absence of attention to issues surrounding men as victims. Did all kinds of research supporting the argument. I even gave her the link and a review of Oprah's 200 Men show. She gave me a B+ because some of the material was not in keeping with the project.

I was OK with that. However, she suggested I could get an A if I edited and rewrote parts of it. I knew she wanted me to take out the "affront" I presented to the course overall by challenging the sexist approach that was being taught. I politely declined.

Just the same I got an A for the course. She offered to recommend me to Hunter for my masters when the time comes. Truthfully, I think she knew I was right, but she had to uphold the coursework she was teaching.

So, thank you TM. And thank you, Concerned Husky
T

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#445112 - 08/22/13 02:08 PM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
Thebo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/11
Posts: 328
Loc: NYC
Classes begin Monday. One class requires a community services project.

An idea I have is to have a survivor(s)holding a big piece of foamcore board. He would be masked and not speak. On the board would be a photo of him about the time he was abused. Written atop would be--

"I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse. Draw how you feel about me." (Remember guys, pictures are preferred over words. After all this is for an art therapy course.)

I'd have a can of markers available. I might have someone film and post it on FB or YouTube as well. The person holding the sign would be partnered with another person who would be his "voice" and encourage people to participate. He or she would provide details: perp, age, etc.

The message is male victims suffer in silence and anonymity. The purpose is to get people to think and express from the gut and the heart how they feel about the topic of male childhood sexual abuse.

I am thinking of being the man in the mask.

Feedback anyone? Also, I haven't submitted it to the teacher yet.


Edited by Thebo (08/22/13 02:12 PM)

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#445211 - 08/23/13 01:16 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3603
Loc: South-East Europe
Hey Thebo, good to see you!
I like your idea and I hope if you'd do it that people would be interested to take part in such performance.
I guess mask would be inspired by abuse somehow and showing silence of victims?

Maybe it could be difficult to be in such situation (masked victim) and to stand there in silence. Person who would assist would need to be very sensitive and to know for many details. It could be intensive.
But I guess as visualization is so important there hasn't to be "real" victim presented. I'm sure people would interact and respond equally toward symbol of victim and his/her suffer in isolation and silence.
I like your idea and it has very strong message!

Pero
_________________________
My story

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#445212 - 08/23/13 02:02 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
Thebo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/11
Posts: 328
Loc: NYC
Thanks, Pero.

Since this would be done on the street in NYC or in one of the city's public spaces like Washington Sq. Park, Union Sq., Central Park I am looking for that "thinking on your feet" responses but at the same time challenge the participant to go more within for those responses.

The mask is to deliberately create the barrier we feel exists, whether real or imagined, and to physically emphasize how disabled we feel from it. I am actually thinking the mask might be better replaced with a blindfold.

The partner would be a fellow student. The purpose of that person would be to act as a monitor, explain the project and based on a predetermined script/dossier, provide answers to questions. I would solicit at school foe a volunteer, but I am willing to do it myself.

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#455321 - 11/28/13 02:26 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
peroperic2009 Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/11
Posts: 3603
Loc: South-East Europe
Hello Thebo, how are you?
I see that we didn't have any updates here since August, so how is going your school project, are there any news?
Be well!

Pero
_________________________
My story

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#455330 - 11/28/13 08:00 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 677
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
Hi Thebo. Your project sounds powerfully focused. I feel the intensity of it. You may want to be prepared for some intensity of feelings/emotions from the public participants. It might be interesting if you could find some way to discern if there are any common characteristics in the population of responders. This feels like it has the possibilities for some AHA moments. Good luck. Don
_________________________
Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

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#455331 - 11/28/13 08:02 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: Thebo]
don64 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/09/13
Posts: 677
Loc: St. Croix, USVI
It feels to me as if you are walking in GRACE, and have a great deal of support and love from the nonphysical realms. I hope so.
_________________________
Divine Law is not judgment or denial of self truths. Divine Law is honoring harmony that comes from a peaceful mind, an open heart, a true tongue, a light step, a forgiving nature, and a love of all living creatures. Jamie Sams & David Carson, Medicine Cards

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#461942 - 03/03/14 02:37 AM Re: Moving ahead [Re: don64]
Thebo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/11
Posts: 328
Loc: NYC
Yes

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