rrush - yeah -
you KNOW it wasn't your fault.
but you haven't quite come to the place where you BELIEVE it.
you agree with the fact of being guilt-less.
but your feelings tell you the opposite...
because you were there and involved
(tho against your will)
and - just guessing here from personal experience -
your body probly betrayed you and responded unwillingly.
That's where the guilt comes from.
You know that what happened was wrong.
But it was NOT YOU that was responsible for it!
been there... done that...
Of course you are angry now.
But don't be angry at yourself
Put the blame and anger where they belong -
the abuser who does deserve it!
i know it's easier said than done.
i'm still working on it too
as are many if not most of us here...
Good for you for speaking out!!!
"That you are here - that life exists, and identity; that the powerful play goes on and you may contribute a verse. . . What will your verse be?" Robin Williams as John Keating in "Dead Poets Society"