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#385640 - 02/13/12 10:48 PM Re: UK suicide prevention help lines [Re: eyesforward]
intruthisfreedom Offline


Registered: 01/09/12
Posts: 14
Just worry because when ever he has been afraid I'm here for him when he is crying I comfort him, who will be there for him in there? He wakes up in the night afraid all the time.

is your man out of the ward now? How is he feeling? How often did you visit and stay? I don't want to stop his recovery by being there all the time.


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#385649 - 02/13/12 11:12 PM Re: HELP - so worried [Re: intruthisfreedom]
herowannabe Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/01/11
Posts: 386
Loc: USA
Quote:
His dad still wants to look after him himself which is crazy, a lot of unhealthy relationships have been going on. I pray the rest of his family and me get help also and realise all these unhealthy patterns of co dependency.


Most recovery programs incorporate the family into the patient's recovery. It's vital that those close to the patient understand the recovery process and are prepared to participate for the sake of the sufferer.

To accomplish this, the psychiatrist will undoubtedly want to talk to you to better ascertain the conditions in which the patient lives and to discover any areas that could derail recovery. If your beloved's health care team doesn't set up a meeting with the family, you should request one! You are very, very much a part of his recovery, which will require he goes home to a safe, secure environment. You or his parents will have to provide that environment. You must be helped and supported in this!

Also, if you have a member of the clergy to turn to, (at your own place of worship or the pastoral staff at the hospital) you might consider contacting him/her.

A visit from a trusted pastor can provide much comfort and hope to one who is so depressed/ill. Oftentimes, the clergy has special training in offering spiritual support along with medical attention. S/he can possibly suggest support groups and other resources for you and your beloved. The clergy member can also provide valuable support for YOU! At the very least, the clergy can offer prayer for your loved one. Sometimes the worship community has a "prayer line" that consists of many people praying specifically for the sufferer.

You've done the very best for your sweetheart! It's a very hard thing to do, but now the healing can begin in earnest! There is light at the end of the dark tunnel you're in! Have faith and take care of yourself, too!!!

Blessings-
herowannabe

_________________________


For I know the plans I have made for you. Plans to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11


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#385650 - 02/13/12 11:21 PM Re: HELP - so worried [Re: intruthisfreedom]
herowannabe Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/01/11
Posts: 386
Loc: USA
Quote:
Just worry because when ever he has been afraid I'm here for him when he is crying I comfort him, who will be there for him in there? He wakes up in the night afraid all the time.

is your man out of the ward now? How is he feeling? How often did you visit and stay? I don't want to stop his recovery by being there all the time.


No worries! He'll likely be given a sedative so he will be able to sleep. If he becomes very upset, a doctor is right there to tend to him. He will be okay, and will probably sleep better than you will! smile

Eyesforward's beloved took his life last week. I know you'd have no way to know of this since you have been overwhelmed with what you're dealing with.

Though we are mourning Eye's loss, I am so blasted awed that she's jumped in to help you.

DO listen to her; there's NO ONE on this board who can help you more than she can!

Eyes: You are a marvel! I'm inspired beyond words...!

_________________________


For I know the plans I have made for you. Plans to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11


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#385657 - 02/14/12 12:05 AM Re: HELP - so worried [Re: herowannabe]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3322
Loc: somewhere in Africa
((((((((((((((((((( Eyesforward)))))))))))))))))))))
(Safe hugs!)



Edited by traveler (02/14/12 12:05 AM)
Edit Reason: spelling
_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


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#385768 - 02/14/12 06:20 PM Re: HELP - so worried [Re: traveler]
intruthisfreedom Offline


Registered: 01/09/12
Posts: 14
Thank you all - another difficult day.

I am feeling very fragile and scared. My mum is coming to stay on Friday and I will call a therapist tomorrow to talk to.

I think my heart is broken :-( T


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#385789 - 02/14/12 08:28 PM Re: HELP - so worried [Re: intruthisfreedom]
herowannabe Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/01/11
Posts: 386
Loc: USA
intruth-

Can you express what is breaking your heart? Are you able to express what is scaring you? Is there something more you are struggling with besides the very real worry about your beloved's health and safety?

I absolutely don't mean to push you, but maybe someone could offer some help for the other troubling thoughts you are carrying???

I'm so glad you have a good mother! She rocks!!! smile

_________________________


For I know the plans I have made for you. Plans to give you a future and a hope. Jeremiah 29:11


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#385801 - 02/14/12 08:52 PM Re: UK suicide prevention help lines [Re: traveler]
Jim1104 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/16/11
Posts: 407
Loc: Louisiana, USA
I am so glad you were able to get him to a safe place. When I checked myself in to substance abuse treatment, it was very scary, but it was the right thing to do. You are absolutely wonderful for the love you have shown him. Show that much love to yourself also.

_________________________
Jim
Male/USA

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#385862 - 02/15/12 05:07 AM Re: UK suicide prevention help lines [Re: Jim1104]
intruthisfreedom Offline


Registered: 01/09/12
Posts: 14
I dont't know if it is a safe place for him.

He called this morning telling me he is lying to all the people there, and he doesn't like any of them. He hates the group therapy because they just put labels on everybody and he doesn't have any thing left to say what he thinks.

Before he went in he was just talking about putting a gun in his mouth and now he has told me he is acting it out (without the gun)

This seems like he is one step further.

The clinic hasn't spoken to me at all about what is happening/will happen what to do. nothing. There is a session on fridays for family which I will go to but i only found out about that because I was reading a notice board.

He is super intelligent,which I feel is causing a problem.

I am so worried.


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#385907 - 02/15/12 01:06 PM Re: UK suicide prevention help lines [Re: intruthisfreedom]
Jim1104 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/16/11
Posts: 407
Loc: Louisiana, USA
Why is he lying?

In my limited rehab experience, I would have to say that it makes some sense that he doesn't like any of the people there. He doesn't know them. I understand the whole label thing and it can be difficult to get past the psycho-babel that we hear sometimes.

As to acting out the suicide? I do that sometimes. I am not saying this is what he is doing, but sometimes, I do it just as a pressure valve thing. Kind of an energy release.

You may be right. He may be over analyzing things and trying to use intellect. In this case, intellect doesn't help as much as allowing your heart to listen.

Of course, I am no expert on all this, but don't let him lie to the people who are trying to help him.

Hang in there. You are both so worth the battle.

_________________________
Jim
Male/USA

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#385929 - 02/15/12 06:46 PM Re: UK suicide prevention help lines [Re: Jim1104]
traveler Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/07/06
Posts: 3322
Loc: somewhere in Africa
Intruth -

I don't have answers for you.
But LOTS of "positive energy" and/or prayers (however YOU prefer to look at it) are being sent your way.
I just know that for me, it got worse before it got better.
I had to collect the "garbage" before i could throw it out.
That part is ugly.
But it is SOOOOOOOOO worth the temporary agony.
He can get better.
Hang in there...

Regards,
Lee

_________________________
As my life goes on I believe somehow something's changed
Something deep inside...
I've been searchin so long to find an answer
Now I know my life has meaning
Now I see myself as I am, feeling very free...
When my tears have come to an end I will understand
What I left behind: a part of me. Chicago


Top
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