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#381932 - 01/10/12 12:29 AM Wives Reading List
F.A. Offline


Registered: 09/02/11
Posts: 229
Loc: United States
What books would you recommend for the wife of a CSA man.
Thank you in advance for your help


_________________________
F.A.

To be sick is to be fragmented. To be healed is to become whole, and to become whole one must be in harmony with family, friends, and nature" -Navajo-
Blog: http://csafresno.blogspot.com
Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/CSAFresno
My Story: http://tinyurl.com/78upvvu

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#382014 - 01/10/12 02:31 PM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: F.A.]
Mitts Offline


Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 13
Loc: Midwest USA
I just recently read "When A Man You Loved Was Abused" by Cecil Murphey. I thought it was very helpful. You can look it up on amazon & see if it looks like what you are looking for.


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#382020 - 01/10/12 02:54 PM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: F.A.]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 597
Loc: VA
"Abused Boys" by Mic Hunter is good--it gives several case histories that show how different CSA experiences can affect men later in life.

John


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#382028 - 01/10/12 03:37 PM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: unhappycamper]
F.A. Offline


Registered: 09/02/11
Posts: 229
Loc: United States
Thank you keep them coming please

_________________________
F.A.

To be sick is to be fragmented. To be healed is to become whole, and to become whole one must be in harmony with family, friends, and nature" -Navajo-
Blog: http://csafresno.blogspot.com
Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/CSAFresno
My Story: http://tinyurl.com/78upvvu

Top
#382075 - 01/11/12 09:06 AM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: Mitts]
mcl1982 Offline


Registered: 01/09/12
Posts: 44
Loc: IL
I just bought this for my gf, well we broke up but she's trying. I found this book and asked if she'd be willing to read this book and she said yes as long as I agreed to read the love dare. I hope this book will help her better understand.


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#382082 - 01/11/12 10:43 AM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: mcl1982]
eyesforward Offline


Registered: 03/13/11
Posts: 92
Loc: Ontario
F.A.
It depends what you want to learn or understand -- what he's going through or what you're going through.

I've read
1. Ken Singer's Evicting the Perpetrator
2. Richard Gartner's Beyond Betrayal

I am reading
3. Mike Lew's Victims No Longer
4. Marie Browne & Marlene Browne's If the Man you Love was Abused
5. Laura Davis's Allies in Healing

I'm finding that Mike Lew's book, though its primary audience is men who experienced CSA, is the most helpful in understanding what he is dealing with and going through.

I have really only skimmed or read brief sections of the two books (#4 and #5 above) for partners, spouses, and family of survivors. Other people have found them helpful. I'll post back once I have an opinion about their usefulness to me.

Take good care of yourself.


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#382095 - 01/11/12 01:47 PM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: eyesforward]
F.A. Offline


Registered: 09/02/11
Posts: 229
Loc: United States
I read 2 & 4 found them useful for me. Thank you for the suggestions

Originally Posted By: eyesforward
F.A.
It depends what you want to learn or understand -- what he's going through or what you're going through.

I've read
1. Ken Singer's Evicting the Perpetrator
2. Richard Gartner's Beyond Betrayal

I am reading
3. Mike Lew's Victims No Longer
4. Marie Browne & Marlene Browne's If the Man you Love was Abused
5. Laura Davis's Allies in Healing

I'm finding that Mike Lew's book, though its primary audience is men who experienced CSA, is the most helpful in understanding what he is dealing with and going through.

I have really only skimmed or read brief sections of the two books (#4 and #5 above) for partners, spouses, and family of survivors. Other people have found them helpful. I'll post back once I have an opinion about their usefulness to me.

Take good care of yourself.


_________________________
F.A.

To be sick is to be fragmented. To be healed is to become whole, and to become whole one must be in harmony with family, friends, and nature" -Navajo-
Blog: http://csafresno.blogspot.com
Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/CSAFresno
My Story: http://tinyurl.com/78upvvu

Top
#382412 - 01/14/12 09:57 PM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: F.A.]
GoodHope Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/05/11
Posts: 415
Reading helps me tremendously.

Here is a snapshot of my little library. I put an asterisk by the ones I recommend.

Male CSA Specific
SAM Sexual Abuse of Males by Josef Spiegel*
Evicting the Perpetrator by Ken Singer*

For wives and partners of male CSA
Allies in Healing, Laura Davis
When a man you love was abused by Cecil Murphey
(I have no asterisks by these because they didn't help me because they didn't address how I was to help while dealing with my own pain of betrayal--probably great books if your husband/partners doesn't act out with other people).

Porn Addiction
In the Shadow of the Net, Patrick Carnes*
yourbrainonporn.com

Betrayal/Affairs
After the Affair by Janis Spring*
Healing Your Marriage When Trust is Broken,Cindy Beall* (Christian)
Sacred Marriage (Christian)
Unfaithful by Shriver (Christian)
Marriage Undercover by Bob and Audrey Meisner (Christian)





Edited by GoodHope (01/14/12 10:04 PM)
_________________________
Wife of a survivor

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#382597 - 01/17/12 10:36 AM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: GoodHope]
lucylives Offline


Registered: 04/07/11
Posts: 358
I am currently reading Women who love sex addicts by Douglas Weiss. Ugh. I know it is useful but painful for me to read.


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#382600 - 01/17/12 11:41 AM Re: Wives Reading List [Re: lucylives]
F.A. Offline


Registered: 09/02/11
Posts: 229
Loc: United States
Thank you for the suggestions so much.

Lucylives I am sorry you have to go through this the crime of SA has more than just one victim is victimizes everyone who loves the victim.

_________________________
F.A.

To be sick is to be fragmented. To be healed is to become whole, and to become whole one must be in harmony with family, friends, and nature" -Navajo-
Blog: http://csafresno.blogspot.com
Facebook: http://tinyurl.com/CSAFresno
My Story: http://tinyurl.com/78upvvu

Top
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