I had NO idea you had a little brother and that he's been abused too. This is truly tragic news (that he was abused). Its great news in the HE has YOU. I'm sure you already see that anyway.
11 is one brutal
age if you can't be as frivolous as your peers. I experienced that, and you likely did too. At 11, I so fully admired the kids my age. I wanted SO SO much to be like them. I also REALLY wanted a older male figure in my life that did not terrorize me or use me as warm meat. Your brother is SO fortunate to have you dude!!! I know things suck right now, but I actually am glad that a hurting 11 year-old has a big brother that "gets it." Sorry if that sounds negligent of you, or just totally freakin ignorant. i can do that on occasion.
One thing I see here and older posts is that you see elements of pain and basic elements of life pretty clearly. I've also been thinking about my love of the desert out there (as I've told you before). I have a strange love for those aircraft graveyards in the Pima and Tucson area...which of course leads me to a song.
The video I've attach was filmed in CA desert and at/close to The Salton Sea. If you don't know that place...just stay far away. Breathing the air there can make you seriously ill.
The video was shot with very old-school technology and artistic technique. Computer CGA was not used in the content creation...maybe a bit in the final wrap-export to video. Otherwise, everything you see in it was done as you see it...including film staining. it was a LOT of work for the producer. Both he and Roland (Singer) have a great love of the desert too.
The song is about decay of things...the decay of life even, but from the elements will rise a Phoenix. The "new" (the baby here) rises from and in and surrounded by the decay of what was.
I spent some time (maybe 5 minutes...lol) with Roland last year in a meet-n-greet. He had to endure my gushing about this song...but I let him speak long enough to ask how many times I've had to listen to it to arrive at my own conclusions about it. "About 100."