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#37788 - 11/22/03 03:14 PM stood up for myself
midnight51 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/02/03
Posts: 132
If you guys remember I told you about how my current roomate brought back all of my memories. The other day I was laying on the couch watching a movie by myself and he was walking around cleaning things up and he pointed at me and snapped his fingers for me to give him this garbage that was by me and I lost it. I got so angry and I snapped my fingers back at him in a really really angry fashion and told him "don't fucking snap at me, who the fuck do you think you are." HE then proceeded to get pissed off at me for fighting back at him and started fighting back at me and I just wouldnt let up. He finally just had this dead cold look on his face and walked away. Fuck that shit, FUCK THAT SHIT. It absolutely took everything out of me to do that too, I never would have realized. My heart was going a thousand beats a second and my body got really shakey. But I did it. He went to work a little while later and a few hours after that called and appologized to me. That's all he ever does when I stand up for myself is call and appologize like everything is just suppose to be better. I talked to my therapist the other day and I told her that this friendship is not healthy for me... she asked why I thought that way, and I told her because I felt very gaurded around him and I was sick of him making comments directed directly at me.. like "YOU this, YOU that, YOU'RE this, YOU'RE that" and I'm just sick of it. I'm going home for winter break now for school so I won't have to be there until the beginning of January again so hopefully I can gain some strength and peace of mind while I'm away.

Take Care.
Josh

_________________________
http://midnight61.blogspot.com/

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#37789 - 11/22/03 03:48 PM Re: stood up for myself
theo Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/28/03
Posts: 1117
josh,
jeff took care of the clap(ping) \:D , all i can do is offer my humble

HELL YES!!!!

while holding up my lit lighter in solemn salute. well done and i am truly proud of you.

_________________________
journey well,
theo dewolfe

- It is gift, and gift will find its way
- I inherit through my choice. I build through my affirmation. It is through my freedom that I nurture, or fade into autonomy
- I was not given to serve life, but to embrace it

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#37790 - 11/22/03 05:04 PM Re: stood up for myself
crisispoint Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 2154
Loc: Massachusetts
Good for you, my man! I salute you! That took guts and I'm glad you stood up to him.

By the way, I have a special one-fingered salute for your @$$hole roommate. Consider it a bonus gift.

Seriously, I'm proud of ya, and I join in with Jeff for that round of applause.

Peace, love, and respect,

Scot \:D

_________________________
There are reasons I'm taking medication. They're called "other people." - Me, displaying my anti-social tendancies

fromacuriousmind.blogspot.com
malehurtandsurvive.blogspot.com

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#37791 - 11/22/03 06:03 PM Re: stood up for myself
Thomas Offline
Member

Registered: 07/31/03
Posts: 109
Loc: boise
Josh,

Everyone else has taken care of the claps. So I'll just say Bravo! and Well done!

Tom

_________________________
To know what you prefer instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive. - Robert Louis Stevenson

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#37792 - 11/29/03 01:25 AM Re: stood up for myself
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
Josh, I wish you can find another roommate. But I am glad that you stood up for yourself, and that you will have time away from him to get your mind better settled. Good for you. I wish you well.

leosha

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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