Newest Members
BCtejas, JHNebraska, mike42069, JACKL, Personman
12491 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
kb8715 (114), rom2057 (57), terrapin (51)
Who's Online
1 registered (petercorbett), 27 Guests and 8 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12491 Members
74 Forums
64158 Topics
447714 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Topic Options
#377569 - 12/01/11 02:03 PM Need for privacy vs. intimacy
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1437
Loc: California
While communicating in a pm with someone, I suddenly realized something.

Privacy and intimacy are both human needs, and both of these needs get PERVERTED when we are exposed to sexual abuse as children.

I've never quite got this until I just typed it out just now. I have ambivilence towards people I might want to befriend - aside from low self esteem issues, on top of that, i'm being pulled in 2 different directions by inherent human needs - privacy and intimacy.

I suppose when our boundaries are violated the way they are sexually as children, we don't develop our own healthy boundaries to be able to navigate between these polar opposite needs. We never learn to manage these needs and they wind up causing all sorts of havoc internally. How do we navigate through these two needs? How do "normal" people learn to navigate between these two needs?

Thought for food. :P

D

_________________________
If I'm acting despondent, Please ask me if I'm eating sugar. I keep forgetting sugar makes me crazy.

Top
#377674 - 12/02/11 03:04 AM Re: Need for privacy vs. intimacy [Re: Magellan]
limit Offline


Registered: 04/23/11
Posts: 131
i would think that the idea of intimacy gets fucked up when all that shit happens when youre a kid cause thats what you think intimacy is so then when you want to be close to people you think well i dont want to do that


Top
#377735 - 12/02/11 01:40 PM Re: Need for privacy vs. intimacy [Re: limit]
Magellan Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/31/10
Posts: 1437
Loc: California
Bingo!

We tend to confuse intimacy with love (they're two different things). And we confuse sex with love, and sex with intimacy.

It's no wonder why we have a hard time understanding how to relate with others.

D

_________________________
If I'm acting despondent, Please ask me if I'm eating sugar. I keep forgetting sugar makes me crazy.

Top


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.