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#377532 - 12/01/11 08:19 AM A great perspective for the victims of Penn State
SamV Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5945
Loc: Talladega, Alabama, USA
http://www.dailystrength.org/health_blog...x-abuse-scandal

What We Can Learn from the Jerry Sandusky Sex Abuse Scandal

The Penn State sex scandal, involving Jerry Sandusky, has been in the media constantly since the news broke. It is a horrible; all too often, told tale of children being abused at the hands of a powerful, even beloved, figure. As the story unfolds it seems that more and more victims are appearing with new information about their experience at the hands of this individual.

Our judicial system maintains a guilty until proven innocent ideal, but Sandusky has most definitely been tried in the press. You need only to listen to a sound bite of the interview he did with Bob Costas to come to your own conclusions. My bet is that it would cast a large shadow of doubt in your mind about his innocence.

Nevertheless, as we wait for the facts to be revealed, our hearts can go out to those once vulnerable children who represent only a tiny fraction of the actual number of abused kids in organized sports and other child-centered activities. We have already begun to hear of other such alleged cases. It is as if the cork is off the bottle and all these evils are flowing out.

It raises the question of how we educate our children before we send them out into the world. The common message is respect your teachers, coaches, and authority figures. In general – a good message but not in the absence of the much more important message of - respect yourself.

In competitive sports, kids are asked to stretch their limits and strive hard to be their personal best. A coach or a teacher has a great deal of power in these circumstances, and often parents defer to them in the service of training and educating their children. A problem develops when kids feel that a coach or teacher has authority over their parents or that parents will side with those authorities in a conflict. Instilling an appropriate sense of deference in your children for those authority figures, while simultaneously teaching them to assert their personal boundaries, is a challenging task.

From a very early age children should be taught the difference between appropriate and inappropriate touch and how to use their voice when they are uncomfortable. They also need to feel comfortable communicating difficult topics to their parents. If these subjects are simply ignored at home, because of a parent’s discomfort with the topic, then children are left with the belief that it is not okay to share certain information with their parents.

This speaks to the issue that I mention so frequently in my articles, which is the necessity for open communication between parents and kids. Teach your children how to have their own voice and the appropriate times to challenge authority. If you are not skilled at advocating for yourself then it is crucial that you work on developing those skills because children learn by example. It is our responsibility as parents, to be mindful that we do not directly or indirectly model behavior that would contribute to our child’s inability to develop a healthy sense of self which would prevent them from reporting the inappropriate behavior of an adult.

In the case of Jerry Sandusky, it seems that there were many adults who were complicit in allowing this behavior to go unpunished. There is simply no excuse for that. How can we, as a society, teach our children that no one is beyond reproach when it comes to the despicable act of child abuse if adults are willingly to turn a blind eye to the behavior? This case is a call to action for adults to get involved and ask more questions about the authority figures in their children’s lives and to never, under any circumstances, remain silent if you have even a vague suspicion that a child is being victimized.

- Cyndi

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MaleSurvivor Moderator Emeritus 2012 - 2014

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#378088 - 12/04/11 10:54 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: SamV]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 619
Loc: VA
There's another Sandusky interview from a couple days ago on the New York Times website. We may be legally required to presume his innocence for now, but he came across the way many admitted and convicted pedo's do: stumbling, semi-coherent evasions of direct questions about the accusations; repeated protestations that he "loves" or "enjoys" young kids so much that he has to be with them; insistence that whatever he did wasn't harmful... and now he says he has the same feelings for old people too! Shudder.

Being a lawyer myself, I can't believe Sandusky's lawyer is allowing him to spew like this in the media. If the lawyer thinks it's a proper response to all the negative coverage, or will portray a better image of his client, he's WAY wrong.

John


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#378103 - 12/04/11 12:13 PM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: unhappycamper]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1372
Loc: kansas
is it possible he might be trying to go for an insanity plea?

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#378141 - 12/04/11 04:15 PM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: Obi]
MrEdd Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/24/03
Posts: 317
Loc: Texas
Originally Posted By: Obi
is it possible he might be trying to go for an insanity plea?


I think he is just obsessed and can't see the damage he is now doing to his defense. He is more focussed on somehow gaining access to children than on putting up a credible denial.

His lawyer may try to put up an insanity defense but Sandusky will want none of it. He will try to go for freedom with its access to children over contrition or plea bargaining for a reduced sentance.

The only way I see Sandusky winding up pleaing insanity or pleaing out is if a succession of lawyers drop him as a client.

That's my assesment, but I've been wrong before.

_________________________
Some Things are not problems to be solved, rather, they are facts which must be coped with over time.

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#378239 - 12/05/11 08:13 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: MrEdd]
catfish86 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/27/09
Posts: 825
Loc: Ohio
His lawyer married a 16yo who was 9 months pregnant with his child. Do the math. The lawyer buys into the "we are not abusing them, we are loving them" rationalization and is thinking it is better to reply to the accusers now than to wait until everyone's opinion is formed..



Edited by catfish86 (12/05/11 08:15 AM)
_________________________
God grant me
The Serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
The Courage to change the things I can,
And the Wisdom to know the difference.

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#378244 - 12/05/11 08:34 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: catfish86]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1372
Loc: kansas
i agree with you catfish that his lawyer probably doesn't see anything wrong with it...

however, if i understood the reports correctly his lawyer was indeed dating a 16 year old when he was in his 40's-50's... she got pregnant when she was 16. what saves the lawyer's butt legally, in that, at the time he was dating, and eventually got her pregnant, the age of cosent was 16. don't know if it's changed since then. however, at the time he wasn't doing anything illegal... still disgusting though...

_________________________
live another day. climb a little higher.

my story

my vlog

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#378245 - 12/05/11 08:46 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: Obi]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 619
Loc: VA
Originally Posted By: Obi
is it possible he might be trying to go for an insanity plea?


That doesn't seem plausible. Many serial pedo's have been convicted after making similar statements in court and in depositions. Besides, the defense has to show that the defendant was "insane" at the time(s) of the alleged offense(s), not just when he gave some half-assed interviews years later.

John


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#378246 - 12/05/11 08:52 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: unhappycamper]
MrEdd Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/24/03
Posts: 317
Loc: Texas
You would have to check the state law on the lawyer, but most states raised the age of consent to 18 in the 1990s. Before then there were still some states that had some pretty young ages.

_________________________
Some Things are not problems to be solved, rather, they are facts which must be coped with over time.

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#378256 - 12/05/11 11:06 AM Re: A great perspective for the victims of Penn State [Re: MrEdd]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2589
In PA I believe it's still 16 sadly enough.

We've also got some stupidly pathetic laws and penalties in regards to this crap as well.

Hopefully there will be some big changes in the laws in PA as a result.


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