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#37702 - 11/22/03 12:18 AM goingcrazy
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
not sur ewhat to say, how to say it. just think going crayy.

leosahh

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#37703 - 11/22/03 12:42 AM Re: goingcrazy
MrDon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/08/01
Posts: 957
Loc: Deltona, FL
From your message to me the other day, I wouldn't say you were crazy at all. In fact, I think you are making it quite well. Hang in there!

Don

_________________________
In order to journey to new worlds, we must first be willing to lose site of the shore.

The Mind Body Thoughts Blog
http://mindbodythoughts.blogspot.com/

Check out my relaxing piano music from the heart!
http://www.donshetterly.com

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#37704 - 11/22/03 03:52 AM Re: goingcrazy
Nathan LaChine Offline
Webmaster
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/22/03
Posts: 5378
Loc: Washington State
Leosha,

Man we all go crazy from time to time. The best thing we can do is live through it and learn from it. What is making you go crazy? Is their anything that we/ I can do to help you my brother?


lots of love, Nathan


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#37705 - 11/22/03 01:56 PM Re: goingcrazy
crisispoint Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/24/03
Posts: 2154
Loc: Massachusetts
Leo,

I hear you. You're not going crazy. You're still coming here and reaching out.

Gonna PM you. Hang tight, bro. I'm here. I care.

Peace and love,

Scot

_________________________
There are reasons I'm taking medication. They're called "other people." - Me, displaying my anti-social tendancies

fromacuriousmind.blogspot.com
malehurtandsurvive.blogspot.com

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#37706 - 11/23/03 01:55 AM Re: goingcrazy
Leosha Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/18/03
Posts: 3614
Loc: Right here
total lost trust now. fel nothing with work agin. fel like shold just total go way, not care of no one or tust no one agin. hate him, hate them, hate us.

_________________________
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.

"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963

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#37707 - 11/23/03 02:35 PM Re: goingcrazy
ScottyTodd Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 02/12/03
Posts: 1561
Loc: Pennsylvania
Leo - I hear your anger, hurt, disappointment - quite a bad way to feel. It feels like you lost trust, it feels like you need to go away....but notice "it feels like". I'm glad you're talking about 'your feelings' because that's healthy. If you talk out your feelings, you won't act them out (self injury, hurt yourself, suicide, etc.). Keep talking to those you DO trust...although you FEEL there is no one to trst, I believe there are a few folks (i.e. Susanna? for one) you can trust and talk to. I'm sure there are others here you can still trust?

Big hurts and betrayals pain deep within. But I hope you can get beyond this episode because there are so many others out there that are pulling for you!!!

((hugs)) Howard

_________________________
If you think you can or you can't - you're right!.......anon
It's never too late to have a happy childhood!.....anon
You're very normal for the abnormal situation you've been through..............S. Todd

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#37708 - 11/24/03 02:20 PM Re: goingcrazy
blueelectron9 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/07/02
Posts: 387
Loc: Victoria, BC Canada
I hope you're doing better. Feelings change with time and I wish you the best.

Take care,
Scotty

_________________________
An odd duck who likes even numbers.

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#37709 - 11/24/03 04:15 PM Re: goingcrazy
bountiful1 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/24/03
Posts: 58
Loc: New York, New York, USA
Hi L!!!

I know you are a great guy! Your anger and disappointment are totally understandable. BUT - it looks to me like the anger is at them!!! I know exactly thr truth of what you are feeling. I am sonetimes there myself. The anger is very real and important in it's truth - from and at them!!

It doesn't sound like you are or need to be angry at yourself... You are making a diference in teh way you are doing your work! I know that! Remember - you have veery right to your anger and frustration. Be good to yourself. You deserve that!

Asher

_________________________
I do not know what signature means in 300 words. I am guessing some thoughts?

Great book that captures the truth of PTSD: The Sentimentalists by Skibsrud

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#37710 - 11/24/03 05:02 PM Re: goingcrazy
Tribear Offline
Member

Registered: 11/09/03
Posts: 66
Loc: USA
Quote:
Originally posted by Leosha:
not sur ewhat to say, how to say it. just think going crayy.

leosahh
Leosha,

I know the feeling, and it's crappy. Just a few things, in case they might apply to your case.

First, a therapist told me something 10 years ago that I so often forget. You reminded me of it, fortunately. I'll try to get it right.

"Are you perhaps trying to make sense out of something that makes no sense?"

Maybe you spend a lot of time trying to make sense out of what happened to you. I've spent countless hours doing the same thing. Well, there's no use in wearing yourself out doing that, or judging yourself as crazy for not getting it to make some kind of sense.

Sense doesn't enter into it. It's like trying to understand Adolph Hitler with a rational mind. There's no way to get there from here, because the problem was all his.

On the other hand, if you're observing your own body and mind reactions to what happened, you are probably seeing the NORMAL human reactions to such extreme teatment.

There are books on trauma, and they foretell the same common effects of trauma on 99% of the people who go through it. Many people improve in time, though they usually think they never will. The shock waves are real and need to pass. I hope that's what happens for you.

I've understood the gist of everything I've read of yours so far, if that gives you a reality check. We all need those in this particular area of treatment. This abuse stuff will rattle your head for sure.

Regards,

Tribear


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