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#376924 - 11/26/11 09:50 PM What should I DO about my pain God?
fhorns Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 613
I'm in a jam. I'm afraid I'll be WRONG for trying to move forward.

I've used EFT, but also the Healing Codes to squelch the emotional uproar that'll pop up regularly. Both are very effective tools when used consistently on emotional traumas.

Then, last night, I was at a Christian site for men, and it had a link on woundedness and suffering. It spoke about Paul's "thorn", how he went straight to the Master, and God said "my grace is sufficient for you". I was stunned. Paul could have used spiritual warfare to get Satan off his back........but he DIDN'T! Somehow.........he accepted it.

I'm frustrated since I'm saying to myself "am I sinning if I use the Healing Codes/EFT/anything to lessen the pain? Am I messing up/prolonging the pain by doing this???"

I'm experiencing anger--hoping He'll see my mess and I (won't have to shout at Him in anger). I don't like this. Listening to old lies about myself right now too, due to not listening today--doing what I wanted.

I'm not alone, I know, so I'm just wondering if anyone else has faced this.

Ultimately, I want a closer relationship with Him. I just don't like the non-stop pain.

Alfred


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#376946 - 11/27/11 12:28 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: fhorns]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6709
Loc: USA
Originally Posted By: fhorns

Then, last night, I was at a Christian site for men, and it had a link on woundedness and suffering. It spoke about Paul's "thorn", how he went straight to the Master, and God said "my grace is sufficient for you". I was stunned. Paul could have used spiritual warfare to get Satan off his back........but he DIDN'T! Somehow.........he accepted it.

I'm frustrated since I'm saying to myself "am I sinning if I use the Healing Codes/EFT/anything to lessen the pain? Am I messing up/prolonging the pain by doing this???"

I'm experiencing anger--hoping He'll see my mess and I (won't have to shout at Him in anger). I don't like this. Listening to old lies about myself right now too, due to not listening today--doing what I wanted.

I'm not alone, I know, so I'm just wondering if anyone else has faced this.

Ultimately, I want a closer relationship with Him. I just don't like the non-stop pain.

Alfred


Alfred,

Survivors have their own kind of pain. I think it's a wounding type of pain, like getting run over by a truck. We have a lot of pain and a lot of damage to our self. This kind of affliction can't make us better people until we have untied a lot of the knots in our souls. Then the light starts to break through.

I don't think you are sinning in using techniques to decrease your pain.

It seems that anger is a natural consequence of what you've been through. But it can be destructive and so it's good to find solutions to it. It's a difficult problem I know. I have heard of various techniques in getting rid of anger. Once when I was a pretty young man I was living in a situation where they stored up a lot of glass jars from our food. In a bout of anger I threw a bunch of them against the concrete floor, leaving a thousand glass shards. After my orgy of anger I cleaned up the glass and put it in the trash.

Other people have various methods. Some take up archery and shoot arrows through targets. Some go to the gym and punch a punching bag. Some pop balloons.

Another thing I have done is to play music. Some music is angry music and expresses anger.

There are some important verses about anger:
Be angry and sin not.
Don't have angry outbursts
The wrath of man does not work the righteousness of God.

Puffer


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#376951 - 11/27/11 01:17 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: fhorns]
nltsaved Offline


Registered: 08/26/08
Posts: 827
Loc: Kc,Mo
Disclaimer

Be warned you may be inspired by what you read . you may get offended & if that is the case
let me apologize right now because that is not and will never be my intent. If you do not agree with my post or my faith that is fine everyone is at a different place in their life & also has the right to believe in what they want . I will not argue or debate i just want to share what i feel the holy spirit directs me to write. If you feel it is not for you than that is just fine , Advice is tricky you can take it or leave it . I am human and can blow it .
If it touches you and causes you to reflect and take inventory of your life that is also great . I also believe God gives us all we need to overcome our situations & circumstances .He gives us all we need to accomplish this . It is up to us to do the work. I always try to be honest & come with the truth and yes it hurts sometimes so brace yourself . If you can not handle it than stop now
and turn back. Please turn back if
you do not take into consideration what this disclaimer explains . now it is on you . peace & blessings and may you be blessed and inspired to go to work








I had this discussion at men's breakfast this morning. There are so many things that we struggle with that are not even on God's agenda. And so many that are and it can get hard to tell what is what ,because of the enemy trying to throw us into confusion .

There are things that we suffer with and fight and struggle and rage war against , these are things that we are a lot of the times mislead by our feelings . The thing is, while we are raging war and fighting and struggling through these things The word says we are actually blessed

Matthew 5:6
Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

I am not minimizing the pain that you are feeling , you need not be worried about how you are trying to heal especially if God is at the center of it . I no while going though the fire while God is purifying us is hard it always is . But i think the fact that you are hungering you are thirsting for this righteousness you will be satisfied .
The hard thing is waiting for that deliverance to come. God is either in control or he is not , We are Christians so we have to believe that he is in control . God knows EXACTLY where you are right now in your life . You should only be worried if you are not fighting you are not struggling and fighting for him and yourself. That is when it can get really scary.

You also must know that Satan is roaring around like a lion going to and fro seeking whom he may devour . This also comes into play while you are raging war against the flesh . He wants you to feel like it is never enough .

The fact that you are admitting weakness and confronting them is evidence of your thirsting and hungering . The Truth will set you free the more that is exposed the more is in the light , the more that is in the light the lighter the fall if you do fall.
Because you would have been being honest. People get into trouble when they are not honest with where they are and they have everyone including themselves thinking that they are fixed or they are alright . The fact of the matter is when those people fall they fall hard because not only do they have to face the music in a hard way , pride also becomes a factor.

The fact that you are dealing with your issues head on even through the pain is not only courageous it is showing others how hard this road is and can be . This is not easy being a Christian and the closer you do get to God the more the enemy HATES you and wants to destroy you. You have a heavenly father that loves and cares for you and i no given all the circumstances this can seem like an impossibility but HE DOES LOVE YOU and care for you. This is refinement this is purification . We will be made into the image of Christ . Pruning and cutting away things so the newness can bare fruit . Your fruit is coming brother you will bare much fruit . So do not let the enemy get the upper hand you are A Child of the Most High God , he loves you and YOU WILL NOT ONLY BE REWARDED BUT YOU ARE AN EXAMPLE A SHINING EXAMPLE OF A WARRIOR FOR GOD !!

God bless

_________________________
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n-uYCAfpxrY
TRIGGER WARNING
Video of me telling my story
you are not alone never were
WRITTEN FORM
http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=339159#Post339159
Why i hate Religion but love Jesus
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1IAhDGYlpqY

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#376959 - 11/27/11 07:56 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: nltsaved]
ksequoia Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/16/11
Posts: 92
Loc: NYC
Disclaimer or not, this is offensive and inappropriate. "truth is...", "Fact is...". Hogwash, and it's not advise - it's a crusade. Not debating this. I have a right to be heard too.


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#376965 - 11/27/11 09:21 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: ksequoia]
fhorns Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 613
Ks,

He wasn't talking to you. You're pissed, ok. Don't jump in to "fight" for me; it's not necessary. We're not in a dangerous alley here--we're in a forum. Hatred stirs hatred, so please chill out.

Nlt,

Thank you for your words. I got up early this morning and read it---I had to lie back down. I'm getting the same message when I've thrown it to others and am getting the same message--God's burning stuff out of me.

I'll share one beautiful truth I heard recently. One man said that out all therapies and counseling he's received, just sitting with (accepting) some pain has been the most therapeutic thing he's done. Fighting is my way of pouting aggressively. It never never never changes anything though. So his word was heard.

And your words agreed with him. Thank you.

Alfred


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#376966 - 11/27/11 09:31 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: fhorns]
fhorns Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 613
Puffer,

We've shared many hours together talking. I appreciate you reminding me I'm "normal". Got a question for you, if you've got an answer.

What do (or did) you do with a 'new' normal? God isn't wasting his time, that I know. My only exposure to this change was a man coming up to me before a group time one night saying God had shown him his rags he was wearing, and admonished him to step into his 'new clothes'. He was in tears. God believed in him and loved him to communicate ...........he was special to Him. He had resisted many years, and this broke him...peacefully.

What's your experience?

Alfred


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#376967 - 11/27/11 09:42 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: fhorns]
ksequoia Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/16/11
Posts: 92
Loc: NYC
Nothing to do with you. Nothing to do with hatred. I have an opinion too. Posts with religious overtones make ME feel ABUSED all over again, and I don't think I'm alone in that. Have a great day.


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#376972 - 11/27/11 10:01 AM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: ksequoia]
fhorns Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 613
I'm sorry you did experience that. It wasn't mine. Thanks for speaking up about it. I've read stuff, but never personally known someone who had that background. I read about it looking up stuff on DID, for many from abusive religious backgrounds were only able to survive through dissociating (spacing out, blanking out, going somewhere else mentally).

I don't have full DID. I've just dissociated, even here on the boards at times.

Alfred


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#376987 - 11/27/11 12:50 PM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: fhorns]
JustScott Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/27/08
Posts: 2568
KSequoia, I'm sorry posts with religious overtones trigger you. I can understand why some people have that reaction. Even more so if your abuse or pain came from a religious background or person.

Your feelings are valid and I wouldn't want to ignore or minimize what you fell.

Might I suggest extra care when reading through the Spirituality forums? (Or was this originally posted elsewhere and moved here???) For me I take extra care when reading through the F&F forums... why??? Because there are women there, and women can easily trigger me, and when I'm here reading away, my defenses are usually down a bit as compared to say... when I'm dealing with women at work or in public, or even in church.

For me, because I do understand that there are people here who are certainly triggered by religious posts or overtones, I try to take extreme care in what and how I say things. Although I certainly am more open in what I say and express here in the Spirituality forums.

Alfred, seems like you're doing some hard and difficult digging. I agree with Allen, I don't see using various things to lessen pain or what have you as "sin". God gave us various natural pain killers and the knowledge to make up some un-natural ones. Pain wasn't meant to be part of His world for sure, but it's here sadly enough. If something gives you relief to move through the day, I don't see anything wrong with that at all. I think if we become dependent on these things to function, then we've ceased to truly heal and move forward.

My experience has been, that as I heal and move forward, the pain definitely decreases.


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#376997 - 11/27/11 03:34 PM Re: What should I DO about my pain God? [Re: JustScott]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6709
Loc: USA
I understand there are some here in MS who were seriously abused by persons or parents who claimed to be Christians. Yes, that would make a person very ill-at-ease with all Christians. Yet, the posting of remarks about faith and these kinds of things in the Forum for Spirituality and Survivors is OK. I still try to be careful not to offend anyone, but I guess I can't avoid that sometimes.

I have a book by a man who was seriously abused by his (supposedly) Christian parents.

Spare the Rod: Breaking the Cycle of Child Abuse
Phil E. Quinn

http://www.amazon.com/Spare-Rod-Breaking-Parenting-Concerns/dp/0687391458/

I heard him speak at a day-long seminar on child abuse. It was the first such meeting I have attended after remembering my own abuse. I openly cried as he described how his parents beat him and how he lost hearing in one ear, etc.

He has written several books, including:

Cry Out!

Renegade Saint: A Story of Home by a Child Abuse.

For me, finding true faith at age 18 was the escape from the evils of a non-Christian world. None of those who abused me had claimed to be Christians.

Puffer





Edited by pufferfish (11/27/11 03:41 PM)

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