Newest Members
BusterJones, Desperateforhelp, aniceguy, Green_Lantern, Safe11ride
12121 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
betterdays (29), ChevyMan76 (46), cuda (48), swartzhund (42), wdf9 (70)
Who's Online
5 registered (pufferfish, lostcowboy, 3 invisible), 53 Guests and 2 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12121 Members
73 Forums
62520 Topics
438137 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 2 of 6 < 1 2 3 4 5 6 >
Topic Options
#377384 - 11/30/11 12:49 AM DAY SEVEN [Re: whome]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
LOVE BELIEVES THE BEST

There are two rooms in our hearts, one contains all the things we appreciate about our partner, good cook, kindness, loving, caring, nurturing, and all the rest of the good things our partners are.
The other room caries all the resentful things, liar, cheater, alcoholic, etc.

We must choose not to live in the room of resentments, but rather in the room of appreciation.
The only time we go into the room of resentments is to smile at ourselves and write in large letters across the wall, COVERED IN LOVE.

TODAYS CHALLENGE

Get two sheets of paper and spend sometime writing down on one the positive things about your partner.
On the other the negative things about the partner.
Then place the two sheets in a secret place for another day.
There is a purpose for this later.
During the remainder of the day, pick one positive trait out of the list and thank your partner for this trait

Stay the course

Heal well
Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#377441 - 11/30/11 03:06 PM DAY EIGHT [Re: whome]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
LOVE IS NOT JEALOUS

I think this one speaks for it self
Love is not jealous of friends, possessions, abilities and so on. It also comes into play when someone upstages you or if you feel that they have gotten what you want.
Jealousy can be based on Love or on Envy, Either way it is a powerful and destructive force that has no place in a marriage.
The Green monster also has no place in your life, so if it happens in your office or any of your environments, and it affects you it will affect your marriage.

TODAYS CHALLENGE
Determine to become your partners biggest fan. Take the list of negatives that you drew up yesterday and Quietly burn it.
Then go to her and tell her how proud you are of one of His/Her Successes.

Steer the course
Heal well
Martin



_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#377517 - 12/01/11 06:55 AM Re: DAY EIGHT [Re: whome]
mike13 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/11
Posts: 419
Loc: California USA
Thanks Martin day eight is the best so far smile Mike


Top
#377650 - 12/02/11 12:53 AM DAY NINE [Re: whome]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
LOVE MAKES GOOD IMPRESSIONS

Think about the way in which you greet your partner in the morning, is it a greeting covered in love or is it just a mundane morning with no love and no feeling.
Use every opportunity to greet your partner with love, a smile and a warm embrace.

TODAYS CHALLENGE
Think of a way that you can greet your partner today, and use this as your new way of greeting them from this day on. be creative, and work from love.

Keep the course
Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#377673 - 12/02/11 02:45 AM Re: DAY NINE [Re: whome]
mike13 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/11
Posts: 419
Loc: California USA
Martin what if we sleep on different shifts? She sleeps at night and I sleep during the day. JK I now have some homework to do Mike


Top
#377679 - 12/02/11 05:07 AM Re: DAY NINE [Re: mike13]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
Mike

I think the big thing here is to Be excited when you see her, like you really are happy to be together IN THAT MOMENT.
There must be times when you are together, and don't forget the fone, it to is a great tool.
If you talk to her on the fone, take a moment to put a big smile on your face before you dial her number, the smile changes the way your voice sounds, {Receptionist 101}
If your marriage is important enough, (I'm not suggesting yours isnt) you will adapt some of these techniques to suit your situation.

I think the main purpose of these steps is actually to get your head off yourself, and too focus it on her for a while.

Ill also start a post called romantic tips for today, but one thing at a time.

Hope this helps you Mike and don't be shy, she's still around so she does like you.

Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#377856 - 12/03/11 02:38 AM Re: DAY NINE [Re: whome]
mike13 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/02/11
Posts: 419
Loc: California USA
Martin thanks for the heads up. I meant the last comment as a joke sorry. My wife teaches High School Science and it always makes the students sick when we kiss on the phone. Have a great weekend Mike


Top
#377858 - 12/03/11 03:04 AM DAY TEN [Re: whome]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL

When we ask a wife why she loves her husband she will normally say, he is good looking, or he has a good sense of humour or he is reliable, or he works hard.
Men would say that She's pretty, a good cook, a good mother, wonderful wife etc.
Truth is that these are things and if you took away one of these would you love him or her less?
So love is unconditional, I love you because, I love you. We are friends lovers and confidantes. LOVE IS A COMMITMENT. A choice

Todays Challenge

Do something unusual for your partner today, clean the kitchen, wash her car, buy his favourite dessert or chocolate. It must be something that is solely for them a blessing that will show them you CHOOSE to be with them and do things for them.

Stay the course

Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
#377879 - 12/03/11 08:50 AM Re: DAY TEN [Re: whome]
Dar Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/15/11
Posts: 170
Loc: Missouri
Way to go Martin, Love this.
God Bless

LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL

When we ask a wife why she loves her husband she will normally say, he is good looking, or he has a good sense of humour or he is reliable, or he works hard.
Men would say that She's pretty, a good cook, a good mother, wonderful wife etc.
Truth is that these are things and if you took away one of these would you love him or her less?
So love is unconditional, I love you because, I love you. We are friends lovers and confidantes. LOVE IS A COMMITMENT. A choice

_________________________
All I ever wanted was a hug.

Top
#378071 - 12/04/11 07:59 AM DAY ELEVEN [Re: whome]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
LOVE CHERISHES

A guy has an old car, and it is starting to give trouble. So he takes it to a mechanic and they do an assessment.
The car needs a complete overhaul and is going to cost quite a bit, so the man decides to trade in the old clunker on a new car.
Good decision Yeah

Another man is at work and there is an accident, his hand is badly damaged in a machine. It is going to take a lot of money to repair, and a lot of physio therapy to get it functional again.
The guy has some saving and immediately tells the doctor to repair his hand.
Logical Choice right.

We often treat our marriages as we would the old car, well its broken so trade it in on a new one, but these are the woman that have stood by us through our drinking and acting out, through our recovery.

We don't see them as an extension of our very selves, being married to someone, is like the two become one, ask anyone that has gone through a divorce. The pain exceeds what is normal for the loss of a thing.
Our wives/partners become an extension of our very selves, part of our being. We should treat them as such.
A Important quote for us is
"He who loves his wife, loves himself"

TODAYS CHALLENGE

What need does your partner have, financial or otherwise. Choose to do something that she would normally do, but does not enjoy doing. Clean the house, do the shopping, Buy her that car she always wanted, but that you didn't want to buy because it didn't benefit you.
Choose a Gesture that says I CHERISH YOU, and do it with a smile and no regret.

Stay the Course
Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

Top
Page 2 of 6 < 1 2 3 4 5 6 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.