Newest Members
RodrigoBR, MJ545, Marant, BeingFound, journey4two
12332 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
cricket453 (60)
Who's Online
4 registered (whiteflag, finallyhere, 2 invisible), 28 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12332 Members
74 Forums
63412 Topics
443346 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >
Topic Options
#375666 - 11/17/11 02:39 AM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Chase Eric]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1307
I'm cool with many of the good points brought up. I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. I just don't buy that it's as simple as the media reports lead us to believe. Iím a skeptic by nature.

I really must address one point, however...

Quote:
what about the f**ken kid? what about the damn f**ken kid? Think about the f**ken kid.


I think most of us were in our own figurative shower room dealing with our own Jerry Sandusky's. I haven't spilled my story - but believe me I wear the dirty badge of horror like many here. I donít mind disagreement, but to wholesale make a statement that suggests Iím not thinking of the child based on a simplistic formula that I didnít mention him is a very unfair and misguided assumption.

But isn't that what I'm talking about, anyways? The same thinking is being targeted at McQueary. Simple everything-in-a nutshell formula answers that conveniently label everyone in a tidy package. McQueary didn't call the police so he's a total sh*t. Chase didn't mention "the f*cken kid" so he doesn't think about the child.

So itís about the kid? REALLY? Then maybe we should start acting like it and stop this self-indulgent vent that has all the usefulness of popping pimples.

Anger is just a selfish mental masturbation as far as I'm concerned. Sure - everyone does it, but it produces nothing. I see all the poison spewed out in NewsVine comments, etc. Iím still searching for a place where there is an intelligent balanced discussion on how to address the PROBLEM instead of addressing our offended sensibilities.

I haven't discussed my story, but I will say that - using the established vernacular Ė IF the f**ken adults focused on UNDERSTANDING AND HELPING this misguided person instead of exercising their own self-indulgent hysteria, then he wouldn't have just squiggled down a worm hole and targeted ME.

Necessary background - he was a serial molester who got caught while doing half the 8-9 year-old little girls in the neighborhood. So after all the crap he figured a cute butt was a cute butt (precisely his aim) and mine was his. And that NEVER might have happened if he got the help he needed.

Imagine for a minute if the adults took a different tack. Imagine if they discovered he himself wanted help. Imagine if they indulged THAT instead. He might actually have gotten - hmmmm - therapy? My neighbor friend who I think he also got to might not have withered up and died alone. My little sister wouldn't have gone through her hell. Another sister may be going through similar issues and I still need to find out if he got to her.

But no, the adults decided the plan would be to show each other their self-righteous indignations and literally scare the living perp out of this guy.

So many people have NO CLUE how damaging this mindless selfish rant is; it drove my molester to become an expert at raping under the radar, and made me feel complicit by association Ė terribly damaging all the way around.

I'm a real victim of that anger, because it drove my molester so secretively deep that he had impunity with me, and scared me - a scruffy little kid - to no end that I would be exposed to the same anger if I tried to get help. If someone had the f**ken guts to THINK instead of indulging in their self-serving rants, maybe this perp would have gotten the help he needed, I might have felt safer telling my mom and dad, and my sister and I would have been LEFT ALONE.

_________________________



Click my pic to see why I'm here

Top
#375684 - 11/17/11 09:17 AM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Chase Eric]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6401
Loc: 2.5 NATO Nations
Originally Posted By: Chase Eric
So many people have NO CLUE how damaging this mindless selfish rant is; it drove my molester to become an expert at raping under the radar, and made me feel complicit by association Ė terribly damaging all the way around.


I'm very sorry to hear this, and very sorry you were the victim of a weasel digging underground. I look at the cocaine trade in example of the durability and adaptability of weasels. Nothing could be MORE illegal than cocaine in this country (by virtue of the number of laws and billions of dollars spent on destroying), yet I can walk into any city and find it within 30 minutes.

"Bad" adapts. "Evil" finds its way. Some bad creatures need to be put down. Some need fixing attempts...but anything and anyone whom enables, covers or facilitates their deeds, need to be dealt with similarly. IMO



Originally Posted By: Chase Eric
...Chase didn't mention "the f*cken kid" so he doesn't think about the child.


If that laser dot is on MY forehead, I apologize if it translated to you Eric. I was speaking fully about Globe-head.

Regarding rants here: I think someone needs to state the outrage into words, and that frequently lands on We The Victims.

Sometimes loud and protracted rants are what's required for waking-up all the slack-jaws out there (e.g.: Occupy Wall St).

Some of us were so badly silenced for so long that we need to get it out. If I could bring a bull-horn and my crayons and cardboard to State College, PA, I would.

I scream and stomp my feet as tactfully as possible though. I try to pull back the sheets and turn the lights on. I'm doing it in my town right now with the Lions Club who facilitated their pet habitual sex-offender's presence at every town fair (rich with unsupervised children). They want to believe that with the actual rapist in a cell, the crisis is over. I won't hear of it. I'm blaming the culture of enabling and want it ousted.

Its currently too easy for the public to turn away and look at a nicer picture. Liberating forces in Germany had to literally grab local folks (like living accross the street from the camps) and rub their nose into the hollocaust. I have virtually NO problem doing that.

_________________________
Wishing You Were Here!

The Aftermath Video

The Water Buffalo Song

Top
#375709 - 11/17/11 10:56 AM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Still]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1307
Originally Posted By: Robbie Brown

Its currently too easy for the public to turn away and look at a nicer picture. Liberating forces in Germany had to literally grab local folks (like living accross the street from the camps) and rub their nose into the hollocaust. I have virtually NO problem doing that.


Amazing - just saw Schindler's List last night. We watch it almost once a year around Kristallnacht as a vehicle of focus and remembrance.

I agree with you totally, Robbie - they had to rub their noses in it. It is one of the best decisions Eisenhower made (if I remember social studies class correctly).

The Nazi's ranted and raved and screamed so loudly that there was no room for other thought. If you weren't Heil Hitlering your way down the street, you were suspect. Mob mentality is a powerful thing, isn't it?

The allies just quietly exposed it. There was no proselytizing, no pontification of righteous dogma. They simply marched the residents of towns like Auschwitz, Dachau, Buchenwald, Treblinka, Belzec, Ohrdruf through the camps. The ghosts of the dead and the skeletal survivors spoke in a whisper - heard above the loudest screams.

It is disturbing to see the depths of madness and savagery to which an entire civilization can descend. The real lesson is how the most civilized and refined society in the world - a culture that gave us Mozart, Bach and Beethoven, poets like Brecht and authors like Thomas Mann and Herman Hesse, religion, science, architecture, theater, cuisine - how that could submerge so quickly and completely into the most basal, dark recesses of human behavior.

Nothing in the world compares to the sharpness of that decline - not even Rome going into the Dark Ages. And it was all because a nation allowed a someone to vent and scream and speak so loudly that he drown out any room for other thought.

When we scream, I fear we are speaking over those who have yet to find their own voice. The indulgence of others in the indignation of what happened to ME left no room for my own feelings. I'm still finding my voice, but when I do, I hope it is the quiet whisper of support for other victims - past, present and yet to be heard - rather than the loud daggers of useless rhetoric aimed at the perpetrators.

_________________________



Click my pic to see why I'm here

Top
#375801 - 11/17/11 07:16 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Chase Eric]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1184
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/18/13 12:02 AM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

Top
#375809 - 11/17/11 07:36 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: lapchinj]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6401
Loc: 2.5 NATO Nations
Jeff,

I just read your earlier reply. Yer hitting on some of our worst details in memory. The maintainance of our phisical wounds after the fact would go on and on and on. Besides wondering if we were gonna die, it was also key to keeping the secret. I still truly resent that about the perps. They never learned about the hell it was for us. I remember the pain running-on forever...continuuos.

For me, and many of us, healing was not stablized for years.

I dont know...I give-up trying to figure out some aspects.

I'm sorry you have such details in your memories too Jeff.

_________________________
Wishing You Were Here!

The Aftermath Video

The Water Buffalo Song

Top
#375816 - 11/17/11 08:25 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Still]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1184
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/18/13 12:02 AM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

Top
#375847 - 11/17/11 10:55 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: lapchinj]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1307
((jeff))

No offense taken - really. I was ready for some jet blast, by the way. It's a touchy topic I know.

I was going to write more, but I'd like to just express a simple apology myself - after all, I did start a rather provocative post.

It takes immense courage, Jeff, to be so humble. I respect that, I admire that - and I respect you. Still, you owe me no apology. We don't have to agree on everything to know we have each others backs.

_________________________



Click my pic to see why I'm here

Top
#375850 - 11/17/11 11:19 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: Chase Eric]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1184
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/18/13 12:02 AM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

Top
#375870 - 11/18/11 04:16 AM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: lapchinj]
TOTAL.CONTROL Offline


Registered: 11/06/11
Posts: 12
Chase,

.....*leans back in chair & taps fingers*......I don't know man. Something about your post just seems a little..."off". & yes, my 1st thought was to flame you like the Wave Motion Gun from an old American/Anime' toon called Are Star Blazers. But I've learned that disgression is the better part of valor.

So taking a step back & looking at your statment & viewing it on face value. You seem to make some rather distrubing claims. Such as venting is useless, or talking about what happend to us is a kind of disgrace?? You even go so far as to liken we who choose to speak out to the NAZIs.....not cool Chase, not cool at all.

But in an effort to understand you, I was trying to view your own "rant" (to use your terminology), as a type of Stockholm syndrom. After all you have gone to much effort to cast a very....."understanding light" on what has to be the biggest slam dunk open & shut case (especially post phone interview) case of the centry!!! Yet you still labor to put spinn on this cesspool of REAL SELF INDULGENTS!

Yes Chase.....giving voice to an all to frequent problem is in no way indulgent. The carnal self obsessed acts of our abusers are the only decadent vermin here. Yes.....spinn. that's the word I've been trying to put my finger on! Polyticians & Lawyers are the only Spinn Doctors I know that have the skill to deftly control the public opinion in this forum.

But you didn't count on TOTAL.CONTROL. I don't need a sword of Omens to "give me sight beyond sight" (sorry but I tend to quote tv & movies a lot....its a copeing mechicnizium). So if its not Stockholm.....then what???

Well I do find it odd that you decloak from out of no where just as this Penn state blight has unfolded. & on (to the best of my knowledge anyway) the leading online sight that helps men cope with Abuse.......one so respected that its garnered the attentions of the Oprah show & soon to be on Dr. Phil....hmmm

Chase, I think I'll stop just short of drawing conclusions here. After all I'm sure your ready to lable me all kinds of crazy & or paranoid. But you know, there's a favorite classic tv show of mine that speaks to the kind of paranoia I'm sometimes accused of.

Gladis Kravitz was the town crack pot always calling the police & begging her husband to look out the window. But what even we the audiance tend to forget was that Samantha was a witch....& there were strange things going on in that house.

Mya Angelo was givin the power of her voice again by a teacher Mrs. Flowers who would not stand idol & watch a young girl get swallowed up by a brutal rape. So have a care the next time you try &.....silance what is by deffinition a DISCUSSION FORUM.


Top
#375908 - 11/18/11 12:01 PM Re: I'll likely get FLaMeD for this - but here goes... [Re: TOTAL.CONTROL]
Chet Offline


Registered: 11/09/11
Posts: 16
Loc: Kingsport, TN
Well from the amount of remarks, back & forth, Chase's posts have gotten here, I don't think he's silencing discussion. Quite the opposite, Chase seems to have fostered discussion & even more importantly, thought. He's gone beyond the typical knee-jerk reaction with some thoughtful nuanced writing. I, for one, even as I don't quite agree with everything he says, applaud him for saying saying it.

However, I don't think he's earned such not-so-subtle innuendo as you seem to casting upon him. You seem to be insinuating some very base motives to him without any reasons with your personal remarks abut him 'decloaking' & such. I see no reason to attack Chase with such baseless insinuations. I take Chase for what he seems to be, a fellow survivor dealing with his pain in his own way & time. I'm thinking his 'decloaking' now comes from the same place my arrival here did, the pain brought up by the Penn St. 'blight'. Is everyone who speaks out after this to be suspect?

Address, debate & even, if necessary, attack his ideas, but not the man.

Chet


Top
Page 2 of 3 < 1 2 3 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.