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#375863 - 11/18/11 02:51 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Chase Eric]
Chet Offline


Registered: 11/09/11
Posts: 16
Loc: Kingsport, TN
Chase, may I post this on my FaceBook page, (minus your name, but giving credit to you, anonymously)? I really think this should be read & thought about by a wide audience.



Edited by Chet (11/18/11 12:11 PM)
Edit Reason: typo

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#375875 - 11/18/11 05:56 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Kiva]
TOTAL.CONTROL Offline


Registered: 11/06/11
Posts: 12
I guess we read two different post . Frankly I find your choice of wording some what, dubious. How's it go again...."the boy realizing he was "CAUGHT" in the act"....

Care to shed some light on what looks very much like a statment that infers a willing compliance on the childs behalf??? Hmmmm, no.

Well how about this one. "These boys were mentaly manuvered in to GIVING UP something......??? Ok I'm stopping there. You speak of these boys like flirty prom dates that are just playing hard to get!

Chase I don't know what your angle is in this thing but I just don't think you are who you say you are. Its almost as if you take pleasure in lamenting & waxing poetic about the goings on of the Devil's playground.

The victims will see justice this I know. But I will not allow myself to take my eye off the ball this late in the game. I'm sure ....joe-pa.....thetic would say the samething if his if he were still allowed on the field! So let'em go spend some of that $$$$$$ that he put before the welfare of so many children on a good defence lawyer!!!


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#375882 - 11/18/11 09:21 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: TOTAL.CONTROL]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1443
Quote:
Chase I don't know what your angle is in this thing but I just don't think you are who you say you are. Its almost as if you take pleasure in lamenting & waxing poetic about the goings on of the Devil's playground.


Well i don't know how to even address a statement like that. The fact is I don't know who YOU are, either. Where does that even come from?

I'm sharing my thoughts and even parts of my experience with everyone here. I'm vulnerable in so doing, and I think we all understand that feeling. I know that's how to work through these things. And I haven't even published my story as a lot of you have. I start to share and relate and be open and I'm hit with someone who thinks - what? I'm here to delightfully prance through a "devil's playground"?

Disagree with me. Tell me I'm off base. But it's just wrong to make assumptions and accusations that attack my integrity. I took it at one time in my life. I'm not taking it here, and I'm certainly not taking it from you. If this triggers you and you want to take a shot at me - fine. At least have the grace to aim it off to the side - not right at my head.

"Caught in the act" is PRECISELY how I felt when my molester was found out. Precisely. Even though I was LITERALLY not SEEN being molested, I felt exposed when he was caught molesting the girls in our neighborhood. "Caught in the act" resonates with me because I felt about as low and dirty as this kid in the GJ report may be feeling - as a man now - today. I internalized the guilt my molester should have felt but didn't. I took that on myself.

That's just a fact.

The victim in the GJ report may be going through the same guilt and self torment I went through - knowing he was seen and knowing that no one came to drag his molester away.

Read my posts - I'm talking about the kind of reactions that are so severe they drive away the VICTIMS too. Don't ever forget there are those of us here who have kept this hidden for so long precisely because we feel WE were at fault.

I noticed that in the GJ report, nothing was mentioned that McQueary heard screams or protests. That did not escape my attention, because I didn't scream or protest either. I was a kid feeling complicit in what he was doing. He was pushing all my buttons and it felt like I was caught as well. These are sexual attacks. The fact is, TC, that I have learned I didn't need to scream and fight my molester to prove I didn't want it. And if you knew my buttons were pushed, would you accuse me of dancing in the devil's playground he made for me?

I haven't shared my story and now I'm sort of glad I didn't because I wouldn't want to further poison anyone's well here.

_________________________
Eirik




Click my pic to see why I'm here

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#375884 - 11/18/11 09:40 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Kiva]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 619
Loc: VA
I second all the emotions expressed above. Paterno and the other PSU officials are "the story" only as regards the apparent cover-up of the REAL story: yet another career pedo feasting on a population of boys. From the sound of things to date, Paterno wasn't even the worst of the bungling bureaucrats, when it comes to a cover-up. Did these people learn NOTHING from Nixon's Watergate fiasco? But the cover-up is just a second-tier scandal.

I've heard several sports and news columnists rant that somebody should dismantle the PSU football program, dynamite the stadium, bulldoze the entire university, sow "Happy Valley" with salt, etc. To me, this sounds like more of the hysteria that set off the student riots last week--it's "instead of" facing the REAL problem of ignoring, and being ignorant of, obvious signs that a career pedophile is at work in the community.

But we at MS know that nuking PSU wouldn't change a thing--career pedophilia and cover-ups weren't invented at Penn State. Likewise, firing Paterno and others who "knew or should have known" is just a distraction from working on the REAL problem. The proposed changes in Pennsylvania's child-abuse reporting laws have a better chance of making a long-term difference, and they only deal with responsibilities after the fact.

John


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#375889 - 11/18/11 10:01 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: unhappycamper]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1443
Quote:
I've heard several sports and news columnists rant that somebody should dismantle the PSU football program, dynamite the stadium, bulldoze the entire university, sow "Happy Valley" with salt, etc. To me, this sounds like more of the hysteria that set off the student riots last week--it's "instead of" facing the REAL problem of ignoring, and being ignorant of, obvious signs that a career pedophile is at work in the community.


Right on target, John.

I think they should keep the football program but remove and redirect the profits that go to the administrative scaffold. Make it about the kids. Put the money in a general fund to help defray the cost of education for everyone there.

The adults at that school in charge of the football program blew it big time. They owe a pennace, not the students and not the players. The program belongs to them. Don't punish the adults by taking the program away from the kids.

Maybe there should be an Occupy Penn State movement.

_________________________
Eirik




Click my pic to see why I'm here

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#375895 - 11/18/11 10:20 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Chase Eric]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 619
Loc: VA
Originally Posted By: Chase Eric
[quote]Maybe there should be an Occupy Penn State movement.


OMG, they'd freeze to death up in them thar hills! :0

Maybe a "two deep" policy would help, when escorting minor kids on-campus--i.e., always have at least two "responsible" adults with them, never just one.

Also, these days most public school systems conduct background (law enforcement) checks on anyone (including regular teachers and staff) who will be in charge of their students or on school premises regularly--not a total guarantee of safety, but it's about the best they can do. I wonder if the public high school where Sandusky volunteered checked him out--and if they turned up the earlier Penn State report on CSA allegations. Maybe the growing scandal will eventually answer that question. Meanwhile, Peace! And get ready for Gobble Day.

John


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#375906 - 11/18/11 11:39 AM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: unhappycamper]
Obi Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/28/09
Posts: 1372
Loc: kansas
fellas,

please.... let's not do this.....

please do not let what's going on with sandusky have us going at each other....

this is what perps want... for us to go at each other.. to have us fighting each other...

i'm asking that we get back to what we really need to focus on is those kids who were abused and trying to provide help and support to them....

we also need to help and support all the people that are joining this site now.

we had an influx of people join when the oprah shows aired. we are experiencing another influx of people joining due to recent events...

let's provide them with the support and help that they need because they are just starting their journeys to recovery and it's a very scary, very difficult, first few steps.... they don't need to see us fighting with each other... they need to see us supporting each other. we may not agree with each other but we must show unity in the common goals...

please... let's get back to why we are truly here... to help give and receive the support we all need to get through this...

thanks...

todd

_________________________
live another day. climb a little higher.

my story

my vlog

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#375942 - 11/18/11 05:27 PM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Obi]
Chase Eric Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/25/10
Posts: 1443
Thank you Todd. I sign on to your suggestion whole-heartedly, and will abide.

_________________________
Eirik




Click my pic to see why I'm here

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#379332 - 12/13/11 07:30 PM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Chase Eric]
Undefeated Offline


Registered: 12/12/11
Posts: 175
Loc: Colorado, USA
Originally Posted By: Chase Eric
Letís go even deeper. Consider for a moment the possibility that within that boy were the seeds of greatness. Maybe that boy was thwarted from realizing a greater potential, crippled and distracted by shame and self-doubt and confusion that will likely continue to haunt him until he is old and gray. These are known effects of adult sexual indiscretions with children, and the dynamics are exacerbated when it is a taboo-laced male-on-male situation.

Wow Eric! This one hits home here. I feel like this. I went to college as a Bible Major. My intent was to become a pastor. I never finished college and never went into the ministry. The sad thing is that many people in my life have made the observation that I have the gifts to be a pastor/teacher. Nearly all of them don't know the depths of the damage done to my soul by the abusers. frown Not only all this, but I am starting to get grey too. wink

_________________________
"The sexual abuse and exploitation of children is one of the most vicious crimes conceivable, a violation of mankind's most basic duty to protect the innocent." ~James T. Walsh

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#379349 - 12/13/11 09:24 PM Re: The Loss of Paterno [Re: Undefeated]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1234
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/17/13 11:44 PM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

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