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#374581 - 11/07/11 05:09 PM the past becomes the present
Anthony39 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/15/07
Posts: 345
Loc: Montreal, Canada
I finally watched the news today about the University coach.
Such a shitty deal. Yeah it triggers. No shit. Same age range, same setting, same crap. so many kids , so many years.
All Bull shit.
Institutions responsible for our children welfare, education, development, keeping quiet. Protecting their own asses.
I don't know what im writing, not coming out right. I just need to vent some.

_________________________
Look up and not down; look forward and not back; look out and not in; and lend a hand.
E. E. Hale


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM213aMKTHg

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#374582 - 11/07/11 05:10 PM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: Anthony39]
Anthony39 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/15/07
Posts: 345
Loc: Montreal, Canada
ps.

They can all go fuck themselves.

_________________________
Look up and not down; look forward and not back; look out and not in; and lend a hand.
E. E. Hale


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM213aMKTHg

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#374584 - 11/07/11 05:30 PM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: Anthony39]
Incognito Offline


Registered: 04/17/11
Posts: 105
I briefly read what happened and it hits home hard. I couldn't read the entire article because of certain memories. The only thing I can hope for is that there is a special place in Hell for people like him and our perps.

_________________________
"If you're willing to carry the weight, feel the strain, push past the pain, and give more of yourself than others expect of you, the world is yours." - Dave Tate

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#374701 - 11/08/11 08:46 PM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: Incognito]
unhappycamper Offline


Registered: 10/21/11
Posts: 623
Loc: VA
It took over 15 years for either the university or state officials to trouble themselves to actually DO anything... but at least the fact that we're hearing about this perv on the news means that he has finally been caught.


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#374706 - 11/08/11 09:02 PM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: unhappycamper]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1248
Loc: New York
Peace,Rainbows & Healing


Edited by lapchinj (03/17/13 08:57 PM)
_________________________
Stick around, It will get better....

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#374707 - 11/08/11 09:04 PM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: unhappycamper]
Fissy Tsickens Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 09/23/08
Posts: 466
Loc: Bassett, Virginia
Back when I was a high school assistant principal, within a week I was dealing with two abuse cases; one case was a student who had been sodomized with a flashlight by his grandfather, the other a girl raped by her father. After one meeting, I left the conference room, and as I entered the main office, the other assistant principal took one look at me and asked, "What's wrong?" I opened my mouth to speak, but all that came out was a moan before I melted into a sobbing mess. I ran to my office and locked myself behind my door. I was so embarrassed at the time, but I'm not embarrassed about it anymore. Someone has to cry for these kids.

Peace,

John

_________________________
Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home Iíll never see

It may sound absurd...but donít be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but wonít you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
Itís not easy to be me

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#374723 - 11/09/11 03:54 AM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: Fissy Tsickens]
1lifenow Offline


Registered: 03/07/11
Posts: 412
Loc: west coast
Tony, I was lucky enough to meet you at the WoR in Barrie. Your story of the hockey coach and other men of their coaches, priests, teachers, parents and relatives, well I just knew this would be a huge trigger. I think of all the talent left behind by the kids that would have gone on to be great in that field. Turned off forever by a guy who took the drive and determination it took to get on the ice, the field, the basketball court, the stage , the orchestra, the club or team and have that dream just fucking crushed.

The men who would have been great dads who were so scared of the worst case scenario, they would never allow themselves to even entertain the idea of kids. Yet, I know so many men on here are great dads, parents , coaches, mentors - real leaders. Men like you and so many more. I just hope we can all do what we can in our corners to undo as much of this bullshit as we are able.

Show men who are just beginning that there IS a way ahead, show kids that mentoring and coaching is so much more than about the slapshot, the threepointer and the flashy scales. Its about life leasons that teach respect and honoring ourselves and others.

The team of high school boys I coach at first would swear, call the other teams( especially the rural ones) - pig fucking farmers, etc. I am not a teacher but a parent vollunteer and i could sense they were trying to get away with treating me like a vapid substitute.

You can't say that I said - "why not coach? they're just a bunch of fags". Great more compassion - its incredibly disrespectful, shows a lack of class and reflects badly on your school, your parents, yourselves and me your coach for tollerating that language and behavior. Let me put it this way I told them, the first job i had in the lumber mill i worked at had a small space where all the shit from the logs, bark and crap would collect. Every friday night they looked for the littlest guy to fit in this horrible confined space. Every friday night the foreman would point to me and say "you , you clean the nigger pit" . The boys looked at me in stunned silence. Ask Lamont I said( pointing to the only black kid on our team, we wouldnt dream of using that word now would we? He nodded as the rest anxiously avoided my gaze. Point made.

This generation has a chance to put things in context so much more than all of us ever knew. The cleaver / cosby family ideal has dirty secrets that can't stay hidden. Its up to us to help make them see that lies and silence equals hell. We need to let the powers that be know we are mad as hell and aren't going to take it anymore. Tony, I liked your last point the best. I hope they do and leave the rest of us the fuck alone.

grant

_________________________
The need for love lies at the very foundation of human existence. Dalai Lama

WoR Barrie 2011

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#374727 - 11/09/11 06:03 AM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: 1lifenow]
ren42 Offline


Registered: 03/26/11
Posts: 54
.


Edited by ren42 (12/29/12 06:42 AM)

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#374734 - 11/09/11 08:22 AM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: ren42]
kb8715 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/16/10
Posts: 808
The kids at Penn State are angry hurt and confused by all that has happened at a place they love. There is a media circus there and protest by students. Its a learing experience, but not one I had banked on for my son or daughter.

This was my note to my son at PSU. I hope it was wise enough for him.

Dear Danny, I love your passion, I love your loyalty, I love your values....hell I taught you those values right? No PSU did not create that monster. No, the pitiful lack of action by a group of leaders does not make PSU less a great place. But those who did too little need to be accountable, if only morally accountable, for not doing the right thing. PSU won't heal until those who did not step up are gone. And the men who were abused need PSU to support their well being. What happened up there can't be taken back. But you and all your very good and decent friends up there can make sure things are done today to help heal Happy Valley. Keep doing good stuff up there...doing good for others is something you and your sister do so well. That comes from your hearts. All my love and respect...Dad

_________________________
"You can get far in life by pushing except through a door marked PULL...." Profile quote in my oldest son's senior year HS Yearbook.

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#374735 - 11/09/11 08:26 AM Re: the past becomes the present [Re: Anthony39]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1736
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
Hi Guys

Truth is, and this might sound a bit preachy, but if you were a pedo, where would you go to find victims.
The biggest thing about this is the social stigma connected to the subject and the fact that nobody talks about it.
I mean, if all the kids that have been abused by the clergy talk about it, people who are abused in the boy scouts talk about it, it will make it harder for the Pedos to have free reign.
At this point in time they have Carte Blanche, and do what they want.
It is sad to say but the survivors are the ones that are going to have to make a noise about what is going on.
I am currently laying down plans to get our message out to the media, and inform the citizens of our fair country about the danger of trusting everyone.
I hope that many more will join the fight.

Heal well all
Martin

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

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