Hi,
I am so broken. I posted once before about what to do about being in love with a survivor in addictive addiction. Since then I quit my job, sold him our home, backed my car and drove.

So now here I am. Broken and haunted by what could have been. He's not talking to me, won't return phone calls, which may be a blessing but feels like crazy making. The only thing I know is what I have learned here... that if he won't take responsibilty for his own recovery there is NOTHING I can do.

It has become really clear how my own copendancy is out of control. That I need to take care of me and finding some wholeness. But it is so hard to let go of the man I know is in there, the beauty and strength and heart.

My biggest fears are that he will hit a bottom and call me to 'help' (read fix it) or that he will get recovery and want to try again and it will be too late.

Thanks for reading, I just needed to let that out amongst people who understand.

Jennifer

I'm so sorry. You did the only thing you could do.

are you sure?? My heart aches that there was something else... now we are both lost and now we are alone.

There is no guarantee that you can't get back together, but you must take care of yourself right now. Try to focus on that right now.