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#373282 - 10/24/11 10:41 PM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: Sailor John]
men_of_hrts.dbw Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 301
Loc: Orchidland Big Island Hawaii
Brant, Salior and all
Empty promimes and CYA

Last chance, l am so full of energy...propably have a heart attack before suicide does take priority

Sorry



Edited by men_of_hrts.dbw (10/24/11 10:44 PM)
_________________________
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"

Top
#373323 - 10/25/11 12:31 PM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: men_of_hrts.dbw]
petercorbett Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2433
Loc: TEXAS
My brother Doug.

PLEASE don't take the suicide route. PLEASE do not ever give up on yourself.

I had a son who committed suicide. Why? What was there that there was no hope left with?

What was there that he and I couldn't talk and help each other with?

I carry a huge burden of guilt in him taking his life. I was far from the perfect dad for him. Obviously he had lost all confidence and hope in me.

But, my brother, Doug, I too thought about it. I too lost all hope in myself.

Sorry for your problems in getting help from the very institutions that caused it.

I can only offer you Compassion, Understanding & Love. My HOPE that somehow you will have the strength to SURVIVE.

Heal well, my brother, Doug, heal well.

"I will take that lost boys hand, and I will lead him from the depths of darkness, into the sunshine, forever into eternity." As he is me.

Pete..Irishmoose.

_________________________
Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
____________________________________________________________
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.


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#374019 - 11/01/11 09:59 PM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: petercorbett]
men_of_hrts.dbw Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 301
Loc: Orchidland Big Island Hawaii
Pete,
Not much on this subject since it is considered off limits? ...or maybe triggering.
Fk It!

_________________________
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"

Top
#374020 - 11/01/11 10:19 PM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: men_of_hrts.dbw]
ShadowPianoman Offline


Registered: 10/20/11
Posts: 54
Loc: Iowa
Dude, sorry I was out, needed a tune up in the psyc ward. hold on man, just do it....

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0cW_wNWHfks&feature=feedu

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zd_okCHIVr0&feature=feedu

find a 'safe place' Brother. We need a place to feel safe.


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#374061 - 11/02/11 10:34 AM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: ShadowPianoman]
ShadowPianoman Offline


Registered: 10/20/11
Posts: 54
Loc: Iowa
I tried the suicide route, got myself out of it. Sounds weird but I think our survival instincts are so ingrained in us that they spring up even when we try to hurt ourselves.

Been listening to some Glee remake of Lean On Me on YouBoob

Not worth it dude, I gotta hear your story over a cup of coffee.....someday...in the future.


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#374077 - 11/02/11 01:08 PM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: men_of_hrts.dbw]
Sterling Offline


Registered: 10/25/08
Posts: 270
Loc: Winnipeg, Manitoba,Canada
I was suicidal at 9. I even wrote a suicidal letter to myself
at 15.
I wa a loner. Only drank!
Be good to you and all of us. Let the kid WIN , NOT
those who did what they did.

Always.

g


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#375992 - 11/19/11 02:28 AM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: Sterling]
men_of_hrts.dbw Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 301
Loc: Orchidland Big Island Hawaii
So much for the Veterans Mental Health: Was again called a liar...they had me in lockdown from November 5th untill this morning the 18th.

I just now read my discharge papers; they call me a bipolar, schizophrenia paranoid, delusional liar.

They say l have a"well rehearsed story" and have homosexual or bi-sexual orientation.

Why do VA psych doctors with no education or training with M/M sexual assault experience even need to diagnosis me.

Fuck it...it's me and God and you men here at MS from here on out. I flushed all the meds ten minutes ago...as l just now read the discharge papers.

They had me on;
5 mg. Diazepam (valium) three times daily
10 mg. Olanzapine (Zyprexa) three times daily
300 mg. Lithium Carbonate three times daily

A combo that put me into a zombie state.

Fuckers didn't even have the balls to tell me to my face they don't believe me.
Fuck the VA
Thing is, God has punished many of the previous VA doctors who put totally discrediting information in my medical records.

He, the Good Lord, has always led me to>
_________________________
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"

Top
#376001 - 11/19/11 03:47 AM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: men_of_hrts.dbw]
men_of_hrts.dbw Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 301
Loc: Orchidland Big Island Hawaii
Also my family of orgin has received punishment from The Good Lord because they decided since the VA didn't believe me, then why should they believe me.
My family let me flounder in the streets, in a very small town in the California Sierra, Toulumne.
Mom-was taken by a unlicensed contractor for $8K on a bathroom remodel that was left unfinished.
Brother Chris was fired from his job when he crashed a forklift and failed a drug test for marijuana.
Brother Dan crashed his unregistered $40K custom Harley with all S&S engine and black chrome

yup...He has His ways.



Edited by men_of_hrts.dbw (11/19/11 04:05 AM)
Edit Reason: Add comment
_________________________
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"

Top
#376035 - 11/19/11 10:27 AM Re: Confrontation...Big Time [Re: men_of_hrts.dbw]
men_of_hrts.dbw Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/20/09
Posts: 301
Loc: Orchidland Big Island Hawaii
Justa last thought,

The professionals and family members who have discredited me or failed to believe me are maybe influenced by the myths that shadow male survivors of both CSA and ASA.

l have turned it over in my mind, via journaling and prayer/spiritual readings and have found it possible to forgive and move closer to God.

Amen

_________________________
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"

Top
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