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#371601 - 10/03/11 10:08 PM A partner in hell
partner1964 Offline


Registered: 10/01/11
Posts: 3
Loc: Washington DC
Thank you all so much for your previous kind words of support and guidance to my own healing path.




Edited by partner1964 (10/04/11 12:55 PM)

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#371605 - 10/03/11 10:31 PM Re: A partner in hell [Re: partner1964]
Czaesar72 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/10
Posts: 211
Loc: California, USA
Partner1964,

I read your other post about this situation and I may have even reply to it. But all I want to say right now is: What a wonderful human being you are! Compassionate, understanding, selfless, etc, etc, etc...

I hope you are able to find happiness with someone that is more open and or able to take and appreciate what you have to offer and also give some of that back to you; for you deserve it so.

Sincerely,




Edited by Czaesar72 (10/03/11 10:32 PM)
_________________________
Alejandro
A very grateful Alumni of the Level I WoR Sequoia 2011, Ben Lohmond, CA, USA
and Advanced WoR Alta 2011, Alta, UT, USA.

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift; it is the burdens he can understand and overcome.

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#371619 - 10/04/11 02:19 AM Re: A partner in hell [Re: partner1964]
whome Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/07/11
Posts: 1734
Loc: Johannesburg South Africa
Hi Partner

Quote:
wants me as a partner for the comfort, support and care he receives but seems to want intimacy with others.


To be honest most survivors do not understand intimacy. It is the one thing we avoid before we begin to heal.

Quote:
By nature I am a nurturer and want to run back into what seems to be an abusive and non loving environment. DAMN!!!!


This is the first indication that you are a Co-dependent. You need to understand that you are in an abusive relationship, and if something doesn't change, someone is going to get hurt, namely YOU.
Quote:

How can I support him and not feel like a victim.


You need to learn to disassociate your self from this abusive situation. A Decision needs to be made at this point. Look after me, or I suffer and stay and look after him. Choice is not simple but it is yours to make.

You cannot decide that HE should heal, only he can do this. You can however make a decision that you should heal, This is with in your power and ability.

I am not saying that you should cut yourself of from him, but you need to look after yourself. Once you are strong, then you can support him.

_________________________
Matrix Men South Africa
Survivors Supporting Each other
Matrix Men Blog

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