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#371281 - 09/29/11 12:59 AM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: Drop]
alan55 Offline


Registered: 08/19/09
Posts: 202
Loc: Seattle, WA
Sometimes some grounding techniques can help. I get down sometimes,too....and I'm 57 and didn't really tell what happened until about 1 1/2 years ago. Even my wife - she just thought I didn't like sex much....that was just the start. Anyway, a grounding technique is something like this - these feelings are all that will ever be - not true. Feelings come and go. I am what happened to me - not true. What happened to us is not all we are. We are fathers, sons, uncles, cousins, co-workers, neighbors, friends. I am unique - to a point you are - but in this sense - not true. Look at the numbers that belong to this site. One thing my T taught me - We have been given a dark gift. Odd, I know. But we can take the healing to others who have had to live like us - something no one else can bring but us.


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#371311 - 09/29/11 01:27 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: alan55]
IrishDadTx Offline


Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 53
Loc: Texas
Drop - I know you're going thru hell right now. Listen to Puffer...if you're having real out of body experiences and missing time and all that stuff, reach out and get some help. A common thread of yours is wanting to feel safe, starting to, but then being lost in absolute danger.

I'm a no bullshit guy, so let me put it this way and this is said with love: Break the cycle, now, no more excuses for not getting help...you wouldn't be here if you didn't have the seed (even the tiniest thought) that you can weather this and eventually thrive. So honor that...NOW. You may strike out a few times with different options until you reclaim your life, but break the danger-cycle...pick up the phone, call and make the appointment, whatever -- but do it.

Listen, you deserve to live; there is a purpose to your life. Imagine if someday you could help others struggling with this same thing. If someone came to you stuck like you sound now, but you could help guide them out. That you started today by doing something different, as crazy as it felt, and were now in front of us all years later to shine as a beacon to those struggling like you are now. Even if you touch just one life...it's the stuff of miracles.

Listen to Puffer's advice please. Get yourself safe...be the first person you protect.

Feeling for you, brother.
Kevin


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#371326 - 09/29/11 05:25 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: alan55]
pbert53 Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/26/09
Posts: 576
Loc: Washington, USA
Well said Alan,

Good advice and wisdom.

clap, clap, clap.

listen to this Brandon.

Let us be your support group.

let us love you until you can and are able to love yourself.

you can do this.

keep coming back.

keep listening.

get some help from a professional who knows how to guide you, also.

peace bro

paul

_________________________
If you cannot control what happens to you, you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.

~ adapted from: Sri Ram

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#371329 - 09/29/11 05:34 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: IrishDadTx]
pbert53 Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/26/09
Posts: 576
Loc: Washington, USA
Well said Kevin!

Listen to it Brandon.

Do it for yourself and for your future and for your brother. He would want the best for you as we all do.

When i am stuck in the problem I am unable to work on the problem. When I am focusing on the solution, I am able to get a solution. You can too. You will be able to make things better.

Get some help man. You need it to be the best you are capable of and you are worth it.

I have read several of your recent posts to others and you have good advice and wisdom that you shared with others. You have it in you bro, and you can make it through this. Do it. Just do it.

peace

paul

_________________________
If you cannot control what happens to you, you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.

~ adapted from: Sri Ram

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#371330 - 09/29/11 05:36 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: pbert53]
Drop Offline


Registered: 04/16/11
Posts: 121
right now i circle around between feeling sick, depressed, scared and some kind of numbness where i can joke around but not feel much
ive been to a t before that didnt help
Even they agreed they couldnt help me so *shrugs*
even if i tell on these guys there will be someone else standing up to fill up their spot
gosh its like they are in line waiting for their turn or something

_________________________
Broken eyed and shutdown
Running down the road
Send me straight to hell
Watch me burn, watch me burn

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#371331 - 09/29/11 05:40 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: Drop]
Drop Offline


Registered: 04/16/11
Posts: 121
i know i sound dramatic but its how i feel and i dont seem to be able to change it

_________________________
Broken eyed and shutdown
Running down the road
Send me straight to hell
Watch me burn, watch me burn

Top
#371389 - 09/30/11 10:11 AM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: Drop]
IrishDadTx Offline


Registered: 08/31/11
Posts: 53
Loc: Texas
...right...its how you feel...and simply that...a feeling

and you are also right...you don't think you can change it...but in reality you can. You may not know *how* right now, but you can...and I think you know that.

...final thought...just because one T was unequipped to help you doesn't mean that you are unsaveable. That a load of horse sh*t. Find another. There are good doctors and quacks...same applies to CSA Ts.


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#371417 - 09/30/11 07:41 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: IrishDadTx]
Drop Offline


Registered: 04/16/11
Posts: 121
all i can think about is how many more times till i get it ´right´ then. And do i even want to wait that long.
in the meantime trying to ignore the physical consequences like i used to do,,

_________________________
Broken eyed and shutdown
Running down the road
Send me straight to hell
Watch me burn, watch me burn

Top
#371424 - 09/30/11 10:46 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: Drop]
alan55 Offline


Registered: 08/19/09
Posts: 202
Loc: Seattle, WA
You're worth the work. Maybe no one else says so in our life, but we here do. As IrishDad said - get help. The need you have can't be met unless you make the need known. Call someone and let the need be known....


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#374489 - 11/06/11 06:09 PM Re: What if you can't get out of the circle [Re: alan55]
Drop Offline


Registered: 04/16/11
Posts: 121
im just feeling so.. down lately
like its sucking the life out of me
i go to work but thats about it
just no energy for anything else
my mind circles between maybe you're better of death, or alone, the recent abuse and not.wanting.to.go.to.work or do much of anything really to missing my brother so badly it physically hurts

_________________________
Broken eyed and shutdown
Running down the road
Send me straight to hell
Watch me burn, watch me burn

Top
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