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#369888 - 09/10/11 11:41 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: prisonerID]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1197
Loc: New York
Originally Posted By: prisonerID
This thread broke off into two separate thought processes almost from the beginning.
...
The author of this thread was seeking to express the lack of attention given to men who are assaulted as adults.

Sorry to have helped sidetrack the original discussion. I should read the whole thread before answering just the last few posts.

I hope it can get back on track. That is an important subject.

Sorry
Jeff



Edited by lapchinj (09/10/11 11:42 PM)
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#369889 - 09/10/11 11:54 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: lapchinj]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
Jeff,

No apology necessary. I think both topics are worth fleshing out. It actually helped me to sort some of my own stuff out a bit in how I used to look at the attack that night.

You are more than fine.


Daryl

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#369894 - 09/11/11 12:10 AM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: prisonerID]
lapchinj Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/07/11
Posts: 1197
Loc: New York
hey Daryl,

Originally Posted By: prisonerID
JNo apology necessary. I think both topics are worth fleshing out.

Yeah I realize they're both important but I dislike derailing a thread that's important to the original person posting his thoughts.

I wish I could help getting this thread back on track but luckily I didn't have that problem.

Jeff

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#370220 - 09/15/11 10:27 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: lapchinj]
ModTeam Offline
Moderator
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/06
Posts: 691
Everyone, please keep in mind that this forum is about Adult Sexual Assault, ASA, and not Child Sexual Abuse, CSA. While there may well be a certain amount of discussion of the differing or similar impacts of either as a topic unfolds, please do not "hijack" a thread in this forum from discussions of ASA to that of CSA.

Some replies to this thread have been removed due to departure from the intended discussion for this thread. We regret some replies have had a marginalizing tone, and therefore have removed them in an effort to bring the thread back on track.


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#370299 - 09/16/11 07:59 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: ModTeam]
Anomalous Offline
Greeter Coordinator
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 03/07/10
Posts: 1346
Thank you.

Your attention to this problem is greatly appreciated.




Anomalous

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#371052 - 09/25/11 11:47 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: Anomalous]
SamV Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/13/09
Posts: 5942
Loc: Talladega, Alabama, USA
There is so much I have survived in my life, both in my childhood, and as an adult. I wish to give to both parts of this thread, the men who have been told by society they have no resources to acknowledge their trauma, and that the appearance of a man can be a deciding factor to a perpetrator. As a card carrying member of both csa and asa in this community, I have been perpetrated in my youth and as an adult. Since this thread is concerning asa, I would speak to that.

Cute? I am not convinced:
The man that assaulted me was driven by self gratification. He approached me based on my lack of self confidence and a "follower" mentality. I am white, with Latino back round, I was 6'3", and weighed about 170 pounds. I was in a place I never should have been, with two other guys, one in his twenties, and one about my age, late teens. We were separated moments after we came into the place, and this man approached me and physically assaulted me in a private area that was difficult to get out of, an area that he seemed intimately familiar with and comfortable. I was in the place for a matter of moments, and the decision had already been made.

The de>
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#371810 - 10/06/11 09:11 AM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: SamV]
Tyr Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 10/05/11
Posts: 180
I do not think cuteness was a factor in my ASA. Rather, I went into a situation that I shouldnt' have been in. I am attractive and have muscles and all that jazz but I am not a bodybuilder- but i do have an innocent face and the perp wasnt violent. but created an opportunity and had his friend who was stronger, taller and slightly older than me restraint me,,, but even that wasnt needed since he could restrain me himself based on the opportunity created.

Crux no one is saying you were not innocent. but when i read the original post here, i am puzzled. i agree this is an adult SA forum and the CSA stuff is valid but should be discussed elsewhere.

what about elder abuse or the developmentally disabled. they cant report things that happen to them as easily as we could or can. are they "cute" .... by one definition who knows. however, they are a vulnerable population, and as such based on frailty or lack of mental development at risk for abuse and neglect and sadly, rape.

the perp that raped me had to do a lot to get thru years of training. he used charm, safety and his confidence man to do all that. and then he took what he wanted and it got him off i wager because he knows that in anythng CLOSE to a fair fight, I would mop the floor with him. though his 2ndary mate, teh one who restrained me... he does scare me. a topic for another time.

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#372346 - 10/13/11 11:37 PM Re: Cuteness and ASA [Re: Tyr]
WalkingSouth Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/30/05
Posts: 16264
As Former Texan noted above this thread and the forum it is in, the ASA forum, are specifically geared toward survivors of adult sexual assault.

Due to the continuing controversy regarding threads in the ASA forum and this thread in particular being diverted to the CSA topic, and as a result of request/s submitted to the modteam, this thread is being locked. If there is sufficient feeling among ASA survivors that it be reopened I will happily grant that request.

Remember gentlemen, if you wish to discuss CSA topics most of the forums on this board are dedicated to that. Please post your CSA topics and responses appropriately to those forums/threads.

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“Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ‘Holy ____…! What a ride!’” ~Hunter S. Thompson

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