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#36092 - 01/20/03 05:17 PM Letters for Advocacy
Muldoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/30/02
Posts: 1428
Loc: St Paul MN
In Deans post about Advocacy we talked about writting letters to the paper-editor about SA issues. Gary-CDN and I worked on a letter back in NOV and I would like to post them here so others can use them if you wish . There are 3 versions 200,300, and 400 words. Copy and Paste what you like . Muldoon

Recovering from male childhood sexual abuse

Society still responds to instances of male childhood sexual abuse as if each were an
exception from the rule. Regardless of who the perpetrator is, this type of abuse is the most elemental violation of one’s humanity. As a community we have failed to understand the enormity of this evil and how profoundly it affects the child, the maturing adolescent and the adult. Most victims will remain hidden in silence, held there by guilt and shame, however the child did nothing wrong. The guilt and shame belongs to the perpetrator.

For many children, the experience of abuse unknowingly influences various aspects of their lives, frequently resulting in negative behaviour patterns that may include addiction, depression, low self-esteem and numerous other social/mental disorders.

To free themselves from the past and regain positive control over their lives, the victims must speak up, be heard and understand they are not alone. By ending the silence they begin the process of healing and move from being a victim to becoming a survivor. To facilitate the healing process, a trained therapist can lead the victim through the many stages towards a life, which is no longer controlled by the effects of the sexual abuse.


If all victims stand together as survivors, hopefully we can make changes that will protect today’s children and teach all the children to never hide in silence. It is the Time to Heal. 200 words

Recovering from male childhood sexual abuse

Society still responds to instances of male childhood sexual abuse as if each were an
exception from the rule. Regardless of who the perpetrator is, this type of abuse is the most elemental violation of one’s humanity. As a community we have failed to understand the enormity of this evil and how profoundly it affects the child, the maturing adolescent and the adult. Most victims will remain hidden in silence, held there by guilt and shame, however the child did nothing wrong. The guilt and shame belongs to the perpetrator.

As the child grows older, the memory of the abuse is pushed deep down into the darkest corner of the brain only to resurface many years later in flashbacks. When triggered, these memories may appear as isolated fragments or in many instances, flood the victim with visions from the past. If it is not enough to experience the initial abuse, most victims will relive the trauma for years until the silence is finally broken.

For many children, the experience of abuse unknowingly influences various aspects of their lives, frequently resulting in negative behaviour patterns that may include addiction, depression, low self-esteem and numerous other social/mental disorders.

To free themselves from the past and regain positive control over their lives, the victims must speak up, be heard and understand they are not alone. By ending the silence they begin the process of healing and move from being a victim to becoming a survivor. To facilitate the healing process, a trained therapist can lead the victim through the many stages towards a life, which is no longer controlled by the effects of the sexual abuse.

If all victims stand together as survivors, hopefully we can make changes that will protect today’s children and teach all the children to never hide in silence. It is the Time to Heal. 300Words

Recovering from male childhood sexual abuse

Society still responds to instances of child sexual abuse as if each were an exception from the way things are. We have failed to understand the enormity of this evil and how profoundly it affects the child. It doesn’t matter if the perpetrator is a winning coach, an outstanding scoutmaster, an inspiring teacher, a great provider for your family, a beloved priest, a helpful neighbour, or a nurturing uncle; what they did was evil.

Childhood trauma dramatically affects both the structure and chemistry of the developing brain; Sexual abuse can damage key brain structures associated with rational thinking, memories and emotions. These biochemical imbalances can have profound implications leading to depression and impulsive aggression. The more time that elapses between the abuse and the beginning of treatment the more entrenched the neurological abnormalities manifest themselves.

Be it the coercion of a young, naive child or in the form of violence, sexual abuse is the most elemental violation of one’s humanity. Secrecy is the cement that holds the victim down and keeps him from seeking help. It allows sexual abuse of children to continue despite the presence of concerned family, friends, and neighbours and the
existence of child protective legislation. Males may be more damaged by society’s refusal or reluctance to accept their victimisation and by their resultant belief that they must "tough it out" on their own. Most victims will remain hidden in silence, held there by guilt and shame however the child did nothing wrong, the evil was done unto him. The guilt and shame belongs to the perpetrator.

As time progresses and the child matures, they can become very angry and lonely. They have lost their childhood and in the process, learned to trust no one. For many children the memories of the sexual abuse is pushed deep down into the darkest corner of the brain only to resurface many years later in flashbacks. When triggered, these memories may appear as isolated fragments or in many instances, flood the victim with visions from the past. If it is not enough to experience the initial abuse, most victims will relive the trauma for years until the silence is finally broken.
Sadly, the effect of internalising these events and not speaking out may result in a variety of negative behaviour patterns including: alcohol and drug addictions, depression, despair, low self-esteem, nightmares, memory loss, sleep disorders, lack of intimacy, and sexual dysfunction. To break ourselves from this cycle the victim must speak up and be heard.

By ending the silence we begin the healing and move from being a victim to becoming a survivor. Truthtelling is the process through which we recover real power and free ourselves from the tyranny of the past. As a survivors the healing process can be a wild roller coaster ride as we purge the memories of the past abuse. This emotional release is a very beautiful and a healthy thing. With professional help from a Therapist the survivors learns to navigate through the many stages of healing on the road to regaining our true life. A life, which is no longer, controlled by the effects of the sexual abuse.

It is important that all victims come forward, no matter how long ago the abuse took place, to be heard and join other survivors in the healing process. If all victims stand together as survivors, we can make changes that will protect today’s children from the evil we were subjected to.
It is the Time to Heal. Teach all the children to never hide in the silence.
400 words

_________________________
Teach the Children to Never Hide in the Silence

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#36093 - 01/20/03 09:52 PM Re: Letters for Advocacy
The Dean Offline
Moderator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 07/15/02
Posts: 2080
Loc: Milwaukee, WI
Thanks for these samples Muldoon. We can send thyem far and wide and if a person does not want to they can with hold their names. Let's roll!

Bob

_________________________
If we do not live what we believe, then we will begin to believe what we live.

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#36094 - 01/21/03 08:19 AM Re: Letters for Advocacy
guy43 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/17/02
Posts: 450
Loc: Minnesota
Thanks Muldoon, you've provided an excellent set of letters; t'was just what I was thinking was needed.
jer


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#36095 - 01/21/03 12:36 PM Re: Letters for Advocacy
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Thanks Muldoon, and Gary!

Incredible words!

Victor

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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#36096 - 01/21/03 07:52 PM Re: Letters for Advocacy
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
And International as well !

Dave ;\)

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#36097 - 01/22/03 06:52 AM Re: Letters for Advocacy
Muldoon Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/30/02
Posts: 1428
Loc: St Paul MN
Thanks guys Gary did a lot of work with me and it would be great to get the word out. Most papers will only take 200 words for letters to the editor but there may be other oppertunity to use the longer versions. As I said before this shows the power of this web site when two guys from different countrys can get together and make a change for the better. If anyone get a letter published let us know when and where. Every small victory is a big step in HEALING. Muldoon

_________________________
Teach the Children to Never Hide in the Silence

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