I've read many of the conversations that have taken place on this discussion board, and have been continually astounded by all of your strength, and perseverence. I apologize ahead of time if it upsets anyone that I am a young woman, but I write in tremendous concern for a man who I seek to understand, out of love. It has become real to me that I can never understand his pain, or any of yours. I wish for him so deeply, THIS type of support, but he is so far behind it seems in his healing process. I cannot get him to see a therapist, or at this point, even speak to me, but the fact remains that we have conceived a child. I really don't know what it is I should share, or even ask, except if he was you, what would you need from me? It is nothing short of amazing reading these stories, and thoughts, because he is one and the same with all of you, it;s like revelation after revelation. Because I can't begin to understand on my own. I'm printing out this retreat registration application for him, what are your thoughts regarding this? If anyone feels able to talk with me about this more in depth, I can't tell you how much I would appreciate it. He has been drowning for his entire life, he has made amazing turnarounds from drugs, and alcohol, and I believe in him. He doesn't trust anyone. His father was his perpatrator, his entire childhood, he died in a motorcycle accident. He was in a 4-man prayer group for 2 years, and never mentioned anything. He has been diagnosed with bipolar, now they're saying bipolar 2, but only I seem to know what he is really like, good and bad. And that seems to make him absolutely hate me. You men are amazing, you are compassionate, and very much alive, God bless all of you.