I’ve just come in from the back yard where I’m digging a space beneath an ornamental blue pine to build a small pond. I like the serene character of ponds and the graceful goldfish that inhabit them. They bring a flowing sense of calm to those swirling currents of SA that attempt to erode my inner banks. Writing poetry has a similar affect, well at least the ones that don’t go dark. Far too many do. But far more don’t they just don’t have a place here.

Okay, I know what’s the big deal about shoveling dirt to make tiny ditches filled with water from my garden hose? Insignificant stuff really, when comparing it to being raped or or assaulted. Yet, I find creating, these pools, that most likely will fill up with moss creating another maintenance nightmare, necessary for my healing.

What do others do to find meaning and comfort?

I will make something new and delicious from scratch for friends or us to eat. Something to do with creation and nurturing life in the face of adversity, which, knowing your climate, applies to your situation in spades (Spades! Geddit!).

I remember something I heard on NPR about the calming simplicity of "small things done well" and this has that feel.

-efm

I try and figure out how to fix something, whether it's a part of the house, or some small item. I find some fulfillment in repairing something. I once fixed my old cordless phone from 1994 a couple years back. I was able to look up the part I needed, and 12 bucks later it was working again, instead of tossed in the trash. Restoring value to a broken item feels good.

Andy

You must have one kick-ass yard, Earl!!

These days, the biggest source of meaning and comfort for me is my son. It isn't easy trying to be "all there" for him and a lot of time I just retreat into my own thoughts while I'm holding him, but often I stare into those little brown eyes and that little smile i'm able to tune out some of the memories from my assault and just try to be a dad. being with him makes me fee l like my esistence matters

Nature has such wonderful healing properties it just makes such seemingly simple, uncomplicated sense. I know there's much more complexity to it, but I think you understand what I mean. Ironically I live in a very urban setting and don't get much of a nature fix here, it's something I have to head out to. However I'm a pretty good container gardener and the rather flat rooftop here has more and more appeal all the time. I think above all other things... it's the natural world which is the most healing and comforting to me.