Newest Members
JohnWC, KKumar, J44, Anura, reynel5
12420 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
MADcHATTER (54), Ready2MoveOn (44)
Who's Online
3 registered (highflight, lukehorace, Damian1974), 33 Guests and 6 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
12420 Members
74 Forums
63789 Topics
445462 Posts

Max Online: 418 @ 07/02/12 07:29 AM
Twitter
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >
Topic Options
#358411 - 04/02/11 12:08 PM Cornered (severely)
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
I truly don't know what to do about my money situation. The court has ordered an un-sustainable drain on my income for divorce stuff. The other side is demanding even more. If they DO get what they are seeking, I won't even be able to pay rent.

The legal bills and consumer debt are astounding. I can't even pay for my rebuttal to their efforts to deal me this death-blow they seek.

I could seek bunkruptcy relief but that would not even dig me out of the real-time burden of monthly drain ordered by the court.

So what can I do? If I fail to pay anything that is ordered by the divorce court, the State of NH will throw me directly in jail pending a hearing. The back-log on these hearings is 8 months. NH is wildly aggressive about arresting males who fail to pay a dime on time. My neighbors son is in the same boat. I've seen them come for him. They use about 10 cops to do it too.

I've been corned in deadly ways before: as a child cornered for CSA at their will and pleasure...as a child of domestic violence. All cornering is pure hell for me. Its bad. It is a horror show on a grand scale. WHen I think about past or present cornorings I go into "vapor-lock." Its one thing that will push me beyond my emotional limits. I truly do not know what to do with this.

_________________________
When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

Top
#358425 - 04/02/11 04:07 PM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Still]
devon0 Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 08/07/00
Posts: 45
Loc: TX, USA
It's often too much to deal with post-abuse issues but having to deal with domestic and financial issues at the some time as well is overwhelming.

Often when you are overwhelmed it's like trying to dig a hole at the beach. You dig but get nowhere! Stop digging.

You have an attorney, right? Spend some time talking with him/her about this and your options.

Make a list of all the things and work on the first one you feel you can do something about right this moment. You can work on the others later but at least you're focused and occupied with doing something to relieve the burden. One thing at a time.

_________________________
A life worth living.

Top
#358456 - 04/02/11 10:15 PM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Still]
Czaesar72 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/10
Posts: 211
Loc: California, USA
Robbie,

I read your post and I don't know what to say, except that I second what Devon said...
talk to your lawyer and see what are your options. There has got to be something you can do to help your situation and avoid going to jail.
I truly hope things work out for you and in the mean time, I will keep you in my prayers. I wish the best of luck to you!

_________________________
Alejandro
A very grateful Alumni of the Level I WoR Sequoia 2011, Ben Lohmond, CA, USA
and Advanced WoR Alta 2011, Alta, UT, USA.

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift; it is the burdens he can understand and overcome.

Top
#358467 - 04/03/11 12:20 AM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Czaesar72]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
There are not really any options. The court says "render unto Caesar what is Caesar's." If you are unemployed and your unemployment benifit runs-out...too bad! Pay her! If you get locked-up, you don't get out until you can prove that you have employment arranged when you do get out.

Every day in Family Court, the judge has a huge parade of offenders in for their non-support hearings. They are in orange jump-suits and full hands and feet shackles. By this point, they have already been in the slammer for maybe 8 months. The county jails are over capacity by multipliers.

Of course, by this point, I'll have lost any and all contact with my children forever.

If my life is a fighter-jet pilot, my instrument panel is lit-up like a Christmas tree with fault and failure warnings. The altimiter is spinning to a blur. Quick! What does the pilot do next?

_________________________
When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

Top
#358468 - 04/03/11 12:27 AM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Still]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Is this a modern version of debtor's prison?

In the time of Dickens, they would lock a guy up until he paid his debts. But if he's locked up, how can he ever find money to pay?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Debtors%27_prison

Allen


Top
#358473 - 04/03/11 01:20 AM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: pufferfish]
Czaesar72 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 04/24/10
Posts: 211
Loc: California, USA
I know, this doesn't make sense. How can they expect someone to pay for child support if you have no work, and how can someone get a job, while in jail. This boggles my mind.
I'm so sorry Robbie.

_________________________
Alejandro
A very grateful Alumni of the Level I WoR Sequoia 2011, Ben Lohmond, CA, USA
and Advanced WoR Alta 2011, Alta, UT, USA.

The strength of a man isn't in the weight he can lift; it is the burdens he can understand and overcome.

Top
#358508 - 04/03/11 11:46 AM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Czaesar72]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
NH, I believe, was the last stand of debtor prisons.

This modde of psychotic enforcement is the product of the popular nationwide hysteria from a decade+ ago that sought to end 'dead-beat dads.' Back then the economy was truly thriving. There was no excuse for not paying OR being employed in the legislature's view.

If you know the nature of the majority of legislators, you know why there are some fd-up laws.

Quick! What does the pilot do next?

_________________________
When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

Top
#358512 - 04/03/11 12:58 PM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Still]
Disappointed Offline


Registered: 08/11/09
Posts: 540
Loc: U.S.A.
He ejects to a more typical jurisdiction - one that holds a hearing BEFORE jailing for nonpayment.

_________________________
Female.

Top
#358532 - 04/03/11 06:38 PM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Disappointed]
Still Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/16/07
Posts: 6509
Loc: Terminus
well...yer half-right.

_________________________
When the phone don't ring, I'll know its you.

The Aftermath Video

My Absolute Hero!

Top
#358533 - 04/03/11 07:11 PM Re: Cornered (severely) [Re: Disappointed]
freddie Offline


Registered: 03/28/11
Posts: 42
Loc: California
Start over from RE-BIRTH and that might be in a cell. Consider yourself worthy of the challenges ahead and take on one issue at a time. Break all the wrong and hurt down to more manageable tasks and KICK ASS................................

_________________________
Freddie
__________________________________________________________

Top
Page 1 of 2 1 2 >


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.