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#356169 - 03/11/11 03:01 AM Delete
Samii Offline
New Here

Registered: 12/07/07
Posts: 12
Loc: Japan
Delete.



Edited by Samii (06/20/11 06:33 AM)
Edit Reason: Sorry.

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#356173 - 03/11/11 04:19 AM Re: How? [Re: Samii]
dark empathy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2024
Loc: durham, north england
Hello and welcome.

The funny thing is this is actually how many people start here at Ms and with talking about what happened (I certainly did myself).

A lot of people here have had to struggle with believing what happened was their own fault, or that they were responsable for it themselves, either because the situation itself, or another person involved told them this was so, or because it is simply easier as humans to believe we have some choice over what happened to us.

I'm not saying this is absolutely true for you, but this has been other people's experience in the past.


Whatever your story is though, people on this site will be able to here it without judging, and also try and help you deal with it.

From what you say about "being too nice" it sounds as if your already starting to punish yourself and feel ashamed, and those are certainly things which people here will understand and appreciate.

Also though, what you say, how you say it and when is entirely your affair.

Read other people's posts, contribute if you feel you'd like to, and share what you want to share of your own experience.

There are no obligations on this site other than that it exists for you and for others to try and heal from whatever experience.

Oh btw, your english seems fine to me.


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#356191 - 03/11/11 09:07 AM Re: How? [Re: dark empathy]
Anthony39 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/15/07
Posts: 345
Loc: Montreal, Canada
Sami, take your time and don't give up. It is a long process. But the important thing is that you are here.

I hope you are safe where you are along with your loved ones. I just saw the images of the tsunami and hopefully you are not near that zone.

Please let us know if you can that you are safe.

自分の世話をする

Anthony

_________________________
Look up and not down; look forward and not back; look out and not in; and lend a hand.
E. E. Hale


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eM213aMKTHg

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#356205 - 03/11/11 11:59 AM Re: How? [Re: dark empathy]
looking2heal Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 06/15/10
Posts: 100
Loc: pa
(((samii-san))) i hope and prayer that your ok brother....hope to hear from you soon

_________________________
taking the steps to healing inside

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#356207 - 03/11/11 12:18 PM Re: How? [Re: looking2heal]
RecoveryReady1 Offline


Registered: 12/05/10
Posts: 433
Samii,
Every stage of recovery has it's own challenges and rewards....
You are at a stage that will be very rewarding once you start to let yourself see that it was not your fault.....that the abuse actually had nothing to do with you.......It is so challenging to start this process, but it is the absolute truth.It was not fault and you did not ask for it......Once you start to allow yourself to see the reality of this....things will start to get better and you will move forward in your recovery........
You are just like everyone else here. What you are experiencing now, is exactly what everyone else here had to experience....
Let the people with experience guild you....It does get much, much better.

All the best to you Samii
Steve


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