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#355978 - 03/09/11 12:15 AM Re: watermelon [Re: prisonerID]
Jaifian Offline


Registered: 05/26/09
Posts: 220
Loc: washington state, USA
Thanks everyone. I feel better now knowing it wasn't just me.

A couple of those who remained after I stormed out told me later that they were then subjected to a game of "self-esteem bingo".. so I guess it wasn't ALL shame and platitudes.. there was .. "self-esteem bingo(!)". wink


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#355980 - 03/09/11 12:25 AM Re: watermelon [Re: Jaifian]
CruxFidelis Offline


Registered: 06/16/10
Posts: 486
Loc: NJ
"self esteem bingo?"

That sounds positively soul crushing. Bingo is for children, old church ladies, and people who have the unfortunate fate of attending a baby shower.

I wish our mental healthcare system didn't make people put up with humiliating crap like that and actually treated adults like adults.

_________________________
“If a man wishes to be sure of the road he treads on, he must close his eyes and walk in the dark.”

- Saint John of the Cross

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#355995 - 03/09/11 08:08 AM Re: watermelon [Re: CruxFidelis]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
You just spit out a good deal of watermelon seeds! smile

Jaifian, maybe you could talk to whoever runs this group or even the director? Share with him how it feels to be treated -to such things. I hate that part myself - having to explain to experts how I feel concerning a lot of things. I just wish they knew more about ASA. Makes me want to chew nails and then spit hard enough to shoe a horse.

But if we do not...who will?

Hope the day is a better one for you.


Daryl

_________________________
Broad statements often miss their true mark.

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#356001 - 03/09/11 09:36 AM Re: watermelon [Re: prisonerID]
Dewey Offline
Member

Registered: 11/13/02
Posts: 137
Loc: the sunshine state
These are positive statements it seems. The "n" says never give up, I sure have been tempted to but won't. It also says don't become a victim. I think realizing and understanding that what we experienced was in fact abuse and nothing else is healthy. But claiming the label or status of victim and never becoming anything more than that doesn't seem healthy. I believe we can overcome this. I was abused by an educator, my high school years were the pits and I eventually bailed on school.I don't want that to be the end of the story. If I decide to further my education now, it would be unfair to myself to say that all educators are abusive. I have just as much right and responsibility to become and grow as the next guy, survivor or not. I didn't feel stripped by the watermelon acronym. Attitude is huge. If I'm acting bitchy, I'm going to get a like response from folks maybe. If I'm honest and say I'm dealing with some stuff and feeling frustrated right now, I'm healing from the throngs of abuse and may just get support from those who are close to me. That type of thinking ushers me to shed the cloak of shame healthily without acting in the "fake it till you make it " mode. Plus for me, reading that kind of stuff is like a shot in the arm. I'll forget most of it anyway. Just my unsolicited opinion.
Keep going, Dan

_________________________
I refuse to use my past as an excuse to not have a future.
My hero Dad; Trigger warning- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oi3Hyxuf5AE

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#356002 - 03/09/11 09:36 AM Re: watermelon [Re: prisonerID]
Dewey Offline
Member

Registered: 11/13/02
Posts: 137
Loc: the sunshine state
I hit the button twice, and double posted, whoops!

_________________________
I refuse to use my past as an excuse to not have a future.
My hero Dad; Trigger warning- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oi3Hyxuf5AE

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#356006 - 03/09/11 09:59 AM Re: watermelon [Re: Dewey]
michael Joseph Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
dan (((((((((dan)))))))))))
well I care about you

that may be something you
might want to hear
your friend Michael joseph

you can have a hug or anything you need

Peace MJ

_________________________
Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

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