I was wondering if anyone has had success kicking my drug of choice for depression. It had kept me alive but it is time for it to be in my past. All help and suggestions gratefully received Thanks Mike

hey Mike,

Sex Addicts Anonymous (www.saa-recovery.org) saved my life and helped me clean up this area-I wouldn't have a healthy marriage or know what healthy intimacy was like without SAA.

There were a lot of false solutions I chased in my life, and fake sex became a huge issue that robbed me of a chance to experience real sexual intimacy and love.

I needed support from others who had the same things going on I did, and who had a program they were working to change their lives. I couldn't kick it alone.

Jamie

Thanks for the tip Jamie I will give them a try. Mike

Mike:
I went thru a 12-step program also -- it really helped me - I have sober off of porn and sex outside of marriage for 18 months (as of today).

I was addicted to porn and masturbation for 8 years and i've successfully kicked it. Finding things to occupy yourself and keeping track of every single day in a row that you don't give in are things that might help. Congratulate yourself for every milestone...1 week...1 month etc.... Having something (positive) or someone there you can turn to when you feel really depressed and have the desire to relapse is very important. For me exercise and inspirational rock music were my anti-porn when times got tough and really wanted to give in. Kicking the addiction is an important step in recovery from csa because addiction makes you numb to feeling and as they say "feeling is healing". I feel emotion a lot more now then i did when i still was addicted and my self-esteem is much higher as well. You can do it, there is hope...YOU GOT THIS!!! "No retreat, No surrender!!!"
God Bless Brother,
Nick

Mike,

Thanks for asking for help on an issue that is both tough to deal with and tough to admit that you struggle with. I have been struggling for years with a porn habit. One thing that has helped weaken the grip of porn on me lately and hopefully permanently, is my new understanding of why I have found it so compelling in the first place. What I was seeking in frantically, compulsively, guiltily consuming porn (and it is kind of like gorging on junk food - the junk food of sexual intimacy) was CONTROL. This time, and this time and THIS time I get to be in control, I get to feel pleasure or even ecstasy (in it's original meaning of transcendence of self, literally it means "standing outside of" ). And thus I don't have to always feel like a victim. But what I was really doing was making the wound worse, digging the barbed arrow of trauma even deeper into my flesh. Constantly seeing the scene of my and my brothers' abuse played out before my eyes was not relieving the stress but amplifying it. Hence the need for more and more and more in the age old cycle of addiction, habituation and greater addiction. Recognizing this makes me feel more in control of what I do when I am alone, less tempted and more able to walk away from temptation.

My two cents worth... keep us posted on your progress.

George

Thanks for all the love and support and congrats to all the victories. The last day I viewed porn was the day before I joined MS. I have made it one week and am feeling stronger each and every day. When I feel myself start to slip I just log on to chat and before I know it I am strong again. It is just soooo wonderful having so many people pulling for you. One person does not have to be strong each and everyday, me just take turns. I just want to thank all my Brothers and a few sisters, you know who you are, for all your love and support. I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I will kick this thing once and for all. Thanks Everyone Mike

http://quitporn.net is a good resource.

Mike-

Thanks for bringing up this topic. I believe it's a struggle many of us have. I have recently started to see the people in porn as victims, just like us. They are in a sexual situation they may not want to be in, but have not choice. I realize some are there because they want to be, but it's an industry that utilizes victimization so the question I have is...If we support porn, are we supporting the victimization of others? And since we are all victims as well, should we be more empathetic.

Robert Jensen has done a fair amount of writing on this topic.

Again, thanks for bringing this up Mike.

J

Mike: my story: csa by older neighbor boys when i was 5-6yo. collecting pics when i was about 11yo - porn when i was 14yo -- hardcore porn later - internet. Now I am 52yo.
Been sober from porn / mb for 18 months.

Went thru the 12-steps........

I tried everything else without any success....