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#351577 - 01/22/11 03:20 PM thoughts about use of Language
Avery46 Offline


Registered: 09/23/10
Posts: 1243
Loc: USA
I am apart of a psychotherapy group for this with a diagnosed mental illness. PTSD is a diagnosable mental illness for which, I have. I am not the only one who was sexually assaulted as a child in the group. I am the only MALE in the group who is open to talk about the assault. There are 5 psychologists who work with us NOT all at once in the group though.

Anywho - lol,

The psychologists are voicing several things including the following:

- use owning words for issues about our bodies ie My, me, mine, - like my body, my ear, my feelings, etc.

- use of black and white words is hazardous to ones health as it causes one to be locked or stunted in growth - ie always, never, and now.

- use of word "THE" puts the ownership of an idea or person or condition where it belongs - ie THE perp (not my perp), THE ptsd (not MY ptsd), etc.

I know I used the phrases - my perp, my ptsd and never happy again.

This is empowering verbage/language for me.

Do you have any language barriers/obstacles?

Donnie

_________________________
aka DJsport

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#351582 - 01/22/11 03:44 PM Re: thoughts about use of Language [Re: Avery46]
fhorns Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 613
I find owning my thoughts, my emotions, my failures actually empowers me Donnie. When I first was in a group and "I" messages were mandated, I actually became so aware of.....everybody else doing it in my life. I "heard" it constantly.

For me, it usually makes conversation much easier when I generalize (using "we", "us"), but in a therapeutic setting, it's suddenly........about me, my pain, my confusion.

Owning that, originally, set me back. "Own my sh**? Noooooo way.." But wanting some different, something freer and healthier, meant that....(it came slowly, for sure) I do have sh**, stuff I've spent my whole life repressing, ignoring, yada yada.

I am still sometimes repulsed by people saying "you know, don't you? huh? huh?" Why? Because I remember it's really about me, but they're doing it without being aware of my pain. Because they don't have to feel MY pain. Because I do.

Therefore, these "I" messages both inspire me and repulse me, for focusing on MY pain............hurts. Nothing else. Sometimes...it just hurts.

That's my experience. I know it helps, but honestly, I'm no big fan of MY pain (dammit).

It hurts every time I share it, whether here or in a live group. Every time. Yes........even now. (Maybe it helps? Don't know presently) Thanks for asking. It made me think about how I cope.

Alfred


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#351594 - 01/22/11 05:28 PM Re: thoughts about use of Language [Re: fhorns]
Casmir213 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 05/14/09
Posts: 845
Loc: Northeast, USA
That makes good sense Donnie. Language and thought are very closely linked, so I think becoming aware of and changing language for the better is a good thing. I like the idea of NOT using black and white language, as I do that all the time. Using owning language sounds like a good idea too. I agree with Alfred, it sounds like using owning language would bring us closer to our emotional experience, something not for the faint of heart, but worth the effort. Glad to hear you're in group therapy. I've read that group therapy can be very helpful.

Best of luck,

Rocco

_________________________
I see recovery as a lifelong journey rather than a final destination, a journey, though, which can have many successes along the way.

WoR Alumnus - Hope Springs, OH, October 2009

My avatar is the farmhouse at the Hope Spring, OH WoR. It's a nice place.

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#351600 - 01/22/11 07:07 PM Re: thoughts about use of Language [Re: Avery46]
tommyb Offline


Registered: 11/29/10
Posts: 361
Loc: American South
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