Hi RM, and welcome to MS, glad you are here working through your recovery. Memories of the past have a way of being invasive in all moments of our lives, especially when we least want them around. When I was fresh into recovery and going through therapy, the thing that I found helped me the most in the area of being able to remain sexually intimate with my wife was to remain focused on HER and who she is. She is not the abuser; she is the woman that I've longed for all my life and vowed to spend it with. Keeping that thought in mind helped me to override any other unwanted ones from entering the picture during intimacy. Basically, it becomes all about her, and not about me; being focused on her pleasure instead of myself.
I hope y'all have a great, relaxing weekend together!