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#35090 - 01/14/03 09:07 AM Bittersweet
RJD Offline
Member

Registered: 02/18/01
Posts: 326
Loc: jefferson City, Mo,usa
I feel a melancholy paradoxical mix of sadness and joy today after seeing the movie ANTWONE FISHER. Perhaps it is mixed with issues surrounding recent realities about physical loss. The movie had pieces that I wouldn稚 dare to hope for fear of the pain of all too familiar disappointment.

My eyes are puddled again this morning as I write.

I know the joy of healing, and to know that I have to consciously be aware the depth of the pain. To know both these feelings means I知 vitally alive. To only know the pain by itself feels like a slow death. To only know joy is to experience life on a shallow level that discounts real experiences. I think I just went up into my head and ducked what my heart is speaking.

The movie is definately bittersweet.

I知 disappointed that my wife has to go to work today. Damn the real world.

I知 aware of my need to feel significant, to feel loved, to feel cherrished... to feel sanctuary. I also am aware of the mundane but necessary need for food and shelter.

I know I must fill my own needs to feel significant to myself, to feel loved by myself, and to cherish myself, but it feels iffy today. I want to be held all day. I guess I知 licking my wounds.

I知 giving myself a half smile full of knowing wisdom,acceptance and love. Bobby wants to say,杯hanks Bob for what Bob calls the sanctuary.

another tear just fell.

Thank all of you for the sanctuary I find here.


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#35091 - 01/14/03 12:50 PM Re: Bittersweet
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
MaleSurvivor
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
We're glad to help Bob, I hope the day gets better.

Dave

_________________________
Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

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#35092 - 01/14/03 03:17 PM Re: Bittersweet
Wuamei Offline
Member

Registered: 08/19/02
Posts: 2700
Loc: The left turn I should have ta...
Crying with you, little brother...

That's gonna be a hard movie to see...

Victor (Big & Little)

_________________________
"I can't stand pain. It hurts me."
--Daffy Duck

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