So why is suicide so tragic? Assisted suicide is legal in Oregon. Why shouldn't someone with life-long pain, without faith or hope be allowed to take his/her own life at will?

Suicide is tragic because, in the case of csa victims,


It represents a life of suffering without healing-ending a life doesn't heal abuse.

It represents a life of isolation that ends in the ultimate isolation-so cut off that one dies.

It represents hopelessness in a world where hope exists.

Ultimately it was Zellers decision to NOT reach out, to NOT ask for help (apparently, from his letter).

I think those decisions were what really caused his death-csa trauma and wounds can experience healing-that is the story I'm living and experiencing here at MS

I feel more sympathy for him than anything else - before I went into therapy, before I found MS, I was convinced I was weird, I was sick, I was crazy and I was a pervert. I'm glad I have the answer now but my heart breaks for him and for others that went their whole lives carrying that horrible burden.

Since reading his letter, I haven't been able to get Bill Zeller out of my mind. I have the feeling that if I would have read his letter a year ago, I would have numbed myself from any impact - possibly not reading it to protect myself from feeling more pain. At this point in my recovery, after almost a year of intense EMDR and other methods, I can read the letter, feel his pain, and grow from his words. His letter reminds me how important it is for us to talk - and to have society talk to us in a better way. This awful feeling we all have felt (or are currently feeling) can be drastically improved with hard work and openness. When I read his letter, all I think about is how close he was to finding freedom - his intellect and awareness of his feelings were superb, if only he felt like he could talk. So much work to do.

Yesterday, I posted something to my blog about Bill and I've already had thousands of responses. It made me realize that we have the Nation's attention again (albeit in a tragic way). If we can take Bill's experience and make it a portal to education and understanding, I imagine that he would like that.

Chris
www.buryingjack.com

I'm not trying to bury this thread, but it seems appropriate to mention here another guy who took his own life a few months ago. Liri sometimes came into MS. There were some here who knew him well.

Here is a link to the thread, In Memory of...Liri, whose actual name was Oliver Strummer. He was abused by his dad.

http://www.malesurvivor.org/board/ubbthr...true#Post338563

Guys, life is precious. If you feel that all is lost, then tell somebody. Tell a mod. Ask for help. It's never too late to hope.

Allen

I am sorry about Liri. I didn't know him but he touched many people. Life is not worth leaving, there is too much good here, no matter the situation.