maybe we see the office games men play too clearly in post recovery. the view for me is a huge problem, because i keep waiting for men to get over themselves....
maybe we just work in a capitalistic culture that is in much greater need of therapy than we were.
i heard the "get to know you" idea was key to networking and i have a problem with that to a certain point. i've already written about this here, but if someone at work got to know me, i'd lose my job simply because i'm gay.
however, at my former corporate job, at ibm, they urged me to be openly gay in order to advance my career. i refused. i did not connect being gay with any marketable skill that earns me a salary or a title. maybe that was a mistake... all the gays i knew there avoided layoff and have advanced tremendously in the past decade.
of course our approach depends upon what we do for a living, but in my line of work, i tie success to skills; not age, race, gender, orientation, or religion -- all of which i strongly think matter more than they ever did before. is that my problem, or society's?
and, so far the only place of solace for me --as we end 2010-- in my life and in my job search.... is coming here to this board, because i do think you all, anonymous men, understand the frustrations we face in life before, during, and after recovery.
i excel at what i do. i give every waking moment and all of my energy to the employer M-F. but after hours and on weekends i want to be left alone. personal time, and why i desire privacy, is no one's business. in europe: my professional wishes would be respected -- but here in the u.s. they are considered to be anti-social.
so, maybe somewhere in this mess the rape of 32 years ago affected my work/life balance in 2010. or, maybe, isn't it just possible that we aren't crazy for balancing our lives the way we do? it is the neurotic culture we live in that expects 24x7 attention; multitasking times 10; laughing all the way while we do it; and all of this for less pay each year than the year before. hmmm?