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#353708 - 02/15/11 08:22 AM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: Lesser1]
westchesterguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/13/09
Posts: 421
Loc: Westchester County NY
Originally Posted By: Lesser1
...but I suspect the constant bombardment of CSA to someone who is non-CSA feels the same.


we know its not the whole picture. what bothers me is that i think we have a culture that doesn't care.

when i was doing the college circuit for survivors, i found success in getting people in the audience to realize "why" they should care about male victims and childhood sexual abuse - more than just "aw, how sad."

so, simple example -- they don't have to care about it for themselves since they were not a survivor... what about your buddy? what about a female friend? what about your future son? that is only the beginning -- what about the kid in your 'hood who was raped and then grows up to kill the deli store owner for cash? affect you? maybe not, but it sure affects your wallet!

the point is, somewhere along this laundry list of people and events, the audience always "got it" that at some stage everyone is going to be affected by a male victim.

counter that attitude though with a culture that still laughs at, or thinks its cool, for women to force themselves upon men.... for gay teens on tv shows to do everything they can to bed another guy even if he is straight... to any number of sexually offensive gestures, pictures, tag lines produced on madison avenue. we are a nation obsessed with sex, and guns, and it looks to me as we always have been.

me thinks that this obsession skews the stats, hurts victims, keeps status quo -- which in turn supports an illegal sex industry and legal porn and lets face it, we love our prison mentality so, the more crime (from the abused child turned violent angry adult) the better keep building big gov't.

_________________________
Jeff

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#353743 - 02/15/11 12:16 PM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: westchesterguy]
Lesser1 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/01/10
Posts: 19
.


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#353758 - 02/15/11 02:44 PM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: Lesser1]
speyday Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/31/11
Posts: 45
Loc: Idaho
All, this is a sad but real issue; male abuse is obviously a widespread problem and it seems intuitive, based on my own experience, that the abuse and subsequent impacts to men's lives have a significant real impact on our society, not just the isolated individuals who were abused.

Unfortunately, our cultures lack of recognition and acknowledgement is not surprising and is unlikely to change quickly. We all know, the masculine image is not abused, so men don't acknowledge or go public if they are abused. If there are not significant numbers of MSA victims active in pushing the 'cause', then the cultural image of masculine doesn't change. Meantime, if there isn't a 'market' for treatment or study of MSA, then it doesn't draw research or study because ultimately, that is how capitalism works - go where the money is. (That is not to paint a negative picture of individuals within our society, it's just simply how it is). So if the research and visible, vocal victims are not out there, the perception doesn't change. It's analgous, in my opinion, to so many other in equities that have prevailed throughout history - it's human nature.

So what can we do? Well first, we focus on healing ourselves because we don't do anyone any good if we aren't healthy. Then we work individually and in aggregate to raise awareness of the issue. Carry the cause, so to speak. I hate to call it activism, but to some extent, that is probably required. If we want more studies done, then we have to push for them down avenues where they can potentially occur. If we want to change the perception within our culture, we have to have visible symbols that society can recognize and begin to disassociated the negative perceptions they have with MSA.

The bottom line to me is that the perceptions of MSA within our society are not likely to change within a generation or two - but if we don't start to raise awareness of it now, then our son, daughters and generations beyond will still live with the perceptions we have now.

Didn't mean to ramble here guys, cultural impacts on individuality and all associated side effects are a hot button for me the past few years - at least I now have a 'cause' I can firmly stand behind.

_________________________
To fish or not to fish? What a stupid question.
Real Man | Spey What?



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#353766 - 02/15/11 03:54 PM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: speyday]
westchesterguy Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/13/09
Posts: 421
Loc: Westchester County NY
Originally Posted By: speyday
......Unfortunately, our cultures lack of recognition and acknowledgement is not surprising and is unlikely to change quickly... first, we focus on healing ourselves because we don't do anyone any good if we aren't healthy.....


i wish this website had thumbs up buttons. smile
i agree with all you wrote.

removing the stigma associated with being victims is also an important goal and achievement towards greater understanding, i believe. that is part of, and maybe the final stage of, the "whole picture" but it fails to sell a news story - or oprah segment.

_________________________
Jeff

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#354240 - 02/20/11 11:04 AM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: westchesterguy]
Lesser1 Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 11/01/10
Posts: 19
.


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#355946 - 03/08/11 05:37 PM Re: "1 in 6" the whole picture? [Re: Lesser1]
LandOfShadow Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 684
Loc: Minneapolis, Minnesota USA
Originally Posted By: Lesser1
I personally didn’t get the impression anyone here actually trusts an ASA stat. I don’t even believe anyone was attempting to set any agenda. ...

Very sorry this topic has upset or saddened you. ...


I'm sorry Les. I didn't mean anyone here is upsetting me, nor an agenda I see here. I mean the lack of studies, stats like the 1 in 33 on the RAINN site (I wonder what the 90% confidence interval (estimated) would look like for example), lots of places, the justice departments inaction on prison rape,

As for linking to material, I'm sorry I don't have sources collected and organized. Often MSA is a footnote talking SA (assuming female). It's telling we have to say "male rape", "prison rape"... Like, it's not "real rape"? It would make a great thread to try to assemble something like that.

These are a few I have immediately:
http://www.justdetention.org/en/articlesandlinks.aspx with the human rights report.

Mic Hunter's SA in the Military book, which I understand was difficult to publish due to perceived lack of interest.

* 2.1% of men reported forced vaginal sex compared to 1.6% of women in a relationship in the previous year. http://pubpages.unh.edu/~mas2/ID45-PR45.pdf

* 94% of youth in correctional facilities reported being sexually abused by female staff. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/pub/pdf/svjfry09.pdf

* Among inmates reporting staff sexual misconduct, ~ 65% reported a female aggressor. http://bjs.ojp.usdoj.gov/content/pub/pdf/svpjri0809.pdf

* 50% of homeless youth reported being sexually abused by a female. http://www.nursing.ubc.ca/PDFs/ItsNotWhatYouThink.pdfAll

I'm CSA not ASA. I've tried to learn as much as I can on MASA, and I try to always mention ASA and highlight it when talking male sexual abuse.

_________________________
Et par le pouvoir d’un mot Je recommence ma vie, Je suis né pour te connaître, Pour te nommer
Liberté

And by the power of a single word I can begin my life again, I was born to know you, to name you
Freedom

Paul Eluard

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